kitchen, sitting at the island eating breakfast. I lean back against the granite, gripping it to keep me in place. I could see myself with them. I could see myself with one arm wrapped around her waist, and my other hand messing up Jax’s hair. An asymmetric grin pulls at my lips as she leans over to fix his hair. It makes me want to mess it up even more.
I can see the three of us together. But she can’t. Or won’t. I don’t know which.
I push off the counter to walk over to her, but my phone goes off. It catches Becca’s attention, and she looks at me with anxiety in her eyes. She’s been asking to go home since she woke up. She’s been avoiding me, and not letting me touch her.
Well, she doesn’t move away from me, but she stills in my arms. She doesn’t mold to me and thrive in my embrace like she did last night. I knew it would be like this. I just didn’t know it would hurt this much.
“Yo.” I answer the phone how I always do, but when her eyes fall to the counter and then to Jax, I wish I hadn’t answered it at all.
“Got 'em,” Johnny says, and I know exactly what he’s talking about.
“How many?” He got De Luca and his crew. My fists clench, and my blood runs cold. I’m gonna beat the fucking piss out of them and make them suffer for what they did to my girl.
“All.” An evil smirk forms on my face, and I have to walk out of the kitchen to hide it from her.
I remember what Becca said so I ask, “Is a dragon there?”
There’s hesitation on the other end. I know I’m not supposed to ask detailed questions. It can always come back around if shit on the other end is heard.
“It’s here. All of ‘em.” I nod my head and let out a sigh of relief. Her house is fine, untouched. I got that message when I woke up. And now De Luca is done. That’s everything. Everything that’s given me a reason to keep her to myself.
“Later.”
“Later, boss,” he answers quickly, and hangs up. Short calls, that’s the way they have to be.
My brow furrows as I pocket my phone and walk back into the kitchen. I grip the back of the chair that Becca’s sitting in at the island. As soon as these fuckers are gone, there’s no reason for me to keep her here.
My eyes travel to her son who gives me a happy smile before picking his bowl up and slurping the milk out. I know why she doesn’t want me and it hurts, but she’s right. I can’t put her son through this life. I couldn’t guarantee her safety, and I can’t ask her to risk her son. A frown pulls at my lips, and I can’t help it. It hurts. I don’t want to say goodbye.
“Who was that?” I smirk at her. She’s gotta learn to not ask so many questions. The smirk fades as I realize she doesn’t. She doesn’t have to learn shit; she’s leaving me.
“That was what I needed to hear this morning.” That’s all I can really say to her. She’s already seen too much. I won’t risk her knowing any more.
“We can go home?” Her eyes widen with hope. It fucking shreds me.
“Yeah, doll. As soon as Jax is done with breakfast, I’ll let you two go.”
Becca
Everything hurts. Every last bit of me aches. But I won’t take the pills. I want to feel the pain. My chest hurts the worst. The knot where my heart used to be just won’t go away.
“Mommy!” Jax yells through the hall.
“Jax!” He’s butt naked, and his towel is on his shoulders like a cape. I shake my head and try to hide my smile. This kid. “Baby, I told you to get your PJs on.”
“I want sleepover.” He’s giving me those puppy dog eyes he always gives me. But that’s something I can’t cave on. That’ll never happen again. I’m grateful he isn’t anything but happy about everything. He has no idea. Thank fuck he’s only three.
I squat down and hold back the wince from the slight pain in my ass. “We’ll do another play date with Ava soon, okay?” I gently push the hair out of his face and wrap his towel around him.
He purses his lips and narrows his eyes at me, and I can’t help but crack up