say. I had a ship called the Big Dicker?”
We both guffaw.
“Oh, my sun,” he says, holding his stomach. “What the fuck is wrong with me?”
I just shake my head, laughing so hard tears fill up my eyes.
“I mean, it’s pretty clever. And it’s so me… but you’d think I’d like… grow up a little, right?”
“You didn’t, dude.” I laugh again. “You didn’t change a bit.”
“Holy shit, and I did your… daughter?” He shakes his head. “That is so wrong. I have limits, man. I know I do. I don’t understand how you’re not punching me in the face right now.”
“You didn’t know,” I say, defending future him. “You didn’t know until it was too late. And Delphi takes after her mother. She’s bossy. Told me to stay out of her life.” I shrug. “So I did.”
He sighs. “OK. Well. Let’s get serious about this for a moment. I’m going to assume you’re telling the truth, even though you could just be crazy. Because for some reason I can’t explain, it all feels true, Crux. I believe you. So…” He rubs his hands together. “I think that Corla left because she remembers you.”
“Yeah?”
He shrugs. “I don’t fucking know, dude. I’m making it up. But it’s kinda logical. You got up and walked away from her because you knew this was the defining moment. And she turned around and walked out for the same reason. So this means…” He thinks for a moment. “This has to mean that the last time this happened, neither of you knew the future.”
“How do you figure?”
“Because she was the one giving orders, right? She was all bossy and in control.”
“Yeah, it was like she knew things.”
“But she didn’t know you were her soulmate, right?”
“No. She didn’t. She was as surprised as I was.”
“I think that’s why she went through with it. Soulmates are supposed to be on each other’s sides, right?”
“I guess. Yeah. Works for you and Delphi. So OK. I can buy that.”
“Whatever she knew, she didn’t know what you just told me. I feel that to be true.”
“Yeah,” I agree. “I think you’re right.”
“Maybe she’s been through this whole… cycle? Loop? Whatever?—before and when she met you… when she met you, things diverged.” He snaps his fingers and points at me. “There’s only one way to find out. Go ask her.”
I laugh. “Just go ask her? Just go up to her quarters, tell her guards I need a word with the future queen, and walk right in?”
“That’s one very bad option,” Jimmy says. “Or”—he points his finger at me again—“we could take a little trip through the walls like the old days.”
“That was how we got Corla out of here. But they were on to us pretty quick, Jimmy. We only get one chance to use that route. And if we need to escape tomorrow night, that’s how we do it.”
“Unless we wake up Tray right now and get his little weird ass in on this mission.”
I hesitate. Fucking Tray. He was always the brother I trusted the least. But that’s not the only reason I hesitate. “Even if Tray can help us, that doesn’t mean we should do this, ya know? What if we’re just making the same mistake all over again? What if this is my do-over? And what if I’m fucking it up by taking the same path as I did before?”
Jimmy nods. “OK. Then… we can wait until tomorrow. And if there’s a breeding ceremony you can talk to Corla then.”
“Well, if there is a breeding ceremony, then we have to escape. Because all that other shit will be true too. But Corla was making plans the night before last time. If I don’t talk to her, she won’t make those plans. And if we don’t escape, then we’ll be stuck here like fucking lab rats.”
“And now we’re right back where we started. This whole thing is a circle.”
“I know. Like, I literally know that. I’m stuck inside it, dude. I’m on a fucking loop.”
“OK, how about this? We hope there’s no ceremony but plan like there is.”
“Hope for the best but prepare for the worst.”
“Exactly. And that means you have to see Corla tonight and prepare.”
“You just want to see her handmaidens.”
He laughs. “Not gonna deny that. I might never get another chance to see a Cygnian princess up close again.”
“That’s almost funny.”
“Anyway. I think that’s the best plan, even if I don’t get laid tonight. So let’s go get Tray and—”
“I’m not sure about him. You don’t know