existence,’ Pellaz said. ‘There are too many other issues to be resolved first, too many different Wraeththu strands that need to find harmony and accord. Some hara would react very badly to this information. There could be hysterical purges of Kamagrian harlings, or any number of other fearful consequences. Wraeththu are still too new. The knowledge of Kamagrian could make them afraid that hara were reverting to a human state, that we cannot breed true. Fear makes hara do terrible things. I understand this very well. It may be years before the truth can come out, perhaps even centuries.’
Flick couldn’t imagine how so big a secret could be kept for such a long time.
‘So, what do you get for your silence?’ Ulaume insisted.
Pellaz stared at Ulaume for some moments, and Flick noticed a flicker of impatience in his gaze. ‘I am Tigron. I do not necessarily require something in return. I do what is best for harakind. My love for my race is unconditional, as is Opalexian’s for hers. I am grateful to work in harmony with her.’
‘Work?’
‘There is much we can teach one another,’ Pellaz replied.
‘Such as how to control aruna between hara and parazha?’ Mima asked hopefully.
Pellaz smiled sadly. ‘Not that, I’m afraid. None of us are yet advanced enough to understand it.’
‘Not even Thiede?’ Flick asked.
‘You know very well I can’t confide in Thiede over this.’
‘But he knows everything, doesn’t he?’ Flick said. ‘He must know you’ve been here. He must know about the Kamagrian.’
‘No,’ Pellaz said. ‘He does not, and that’s how it’s going to stay for now. I’m not completely helpless. I have learned enough to protect my privacy.’
‘Will you help us find Lileem and Terez?’ Mima said. ‘Please, Pell. We can’t just forget about them. Ulaume knows they’re alive, as he knew you were alive. He’s never wrong.’ She turned to Ulaume. ‘Are you, Lor?’
Ulaume shrugged. ‘I don’t believe so, not in matters of this kind.’
Pellaz took a deep sighing breath. ‘I have tried to find them,’ he said. ‘Peridot knows what signature to look for in the otherlanes – one very similar to mine. He has found nothing. The otherlanes and the realms they connect are infinite. The task is virtually impossible. And, unlike Ulaume, I’m not convinced Terez is still alive. I’m sorry, Mima, I think we have to resign ourselves to his loss, and to Lileem’s too. I know you were close to her and I appreciate how difficult this must be, but I’ve carried the burden of loss and grief for a long time, and I know you can live with it eventually. It becomes manageable and then it goes away. Life goes on. We have to move with it.’
In a month, it appeared Pellaz had got over his consuming passion for Cal. This did not convince Flick one bit. He knew Pellaz wasn’t telling the truth.
‘You can’t give up looking,’ Mima said.
‘I have to,’ Pellaz said. ‘For one thing, I don’t have the time. I could devote my life to this task and still not find them.’
‘Teach Flick how to ride Astral properly, then,’ Mima said. ‘You could do that. Then Flick could continue the search. Bring us all one of your weird horses. We could all try.’
‘I can’t,’ Pellaz said. ‘The sedim are not horses exactly, Mima, and every one is accounted for. It was difficult enough to ‘lose’ Astral in the first place. Vaysh and I had to concoct a wild story about how he got swept off into the void by an energy storm. We impressed upon the other sedim not to reveal the truth, but who can say how they think and feel? We can’t fathom their being, not really. I’m not sure to this day whether Thiede believes the story. There’s no way I could risk bringing you more sedim. And if I removed the restraints on Astral, he’d ‘show up’ to other creatures of his kind while he was travelling. It’s just impossible.’
Flick had not realised before how difficult it must have been for Pellaz to arrange for him to keep Astral. He wished he’d known that, months ago. It would have meant a lot.
‘There is one thing Opalexian has agreed to do for me,’ Pellaz said. ‘I have a human friend in Immanion, called Kate. In time, Opalexian will allow her to come to Shilalama and be made parage. It’s the least I could do for her.’
‘And you trust this woman?’ Mima said.
Pellaz smiled. ‘If somehar had made you the offer, and