and gather some papers on my desk just to keep my hands busy and hope like fuck Tanner doesn’t notice my reaction.
“He is. Apparently, she’s helping out with Freya’s cat clothes or dog clothes or whatever it is she sells or makes…bloody hell, I’m knackered. There are just too many people connected to our family to keep up.”
I clear my throat and begin to loosen my tie, feeling very warm all of a sudden. “So, you’re saying Tilly is back here in London? Just for a visit?”
“For the foreseeable future, I suspect. At least until that baby arrives. She’s apparently whip-smart in the retail industry so she’s helping Freya with negotiations on a contract of some sort. I don’t know much about it. Roan was saying a lot of words about it this past Sunday, but Vi was making Swedish pancakes, so I was mostly just focused on making sure I got my fair share. Bloody love Vi’s Swedish pancakes.”
Tanner continues rattling on about food, clearly having forgotten the fact that I don’t just have history with Mac’s wife, I have history with his sister, Tilly. History that I can’t seem to forget no matter how hard I try.
Before I can think better of it, I hear myself replying, “I’ll be there.”
“At the event? Excellent! You’re always very free with your riches.” Tanner pulls up his clipboard and scribbles my name down. “And your plus one?”
“No plus one.” I wince as a flash of my latest ex, Bria’s, sad face crosses my mind. “Just me.”
Tanner’s face falls. “Oh, bloody hell, the two-month chump strikes again?” I growl with annoyance at the American nickname our scout in the states dubbed me with a few years ago. It’s been picked up around the changing room with the players and I bloody hate it. “Come on now, what was wrong with Bria? She too pretty? Too successful? Oh…did she cook with too much garlic?”
“Sod off,” I grumble. “I’m Italian, so garlic is basically a food group. We just weren’t right for each other.”
“Booker owes me ten quid,” Tanner replies with a laugh as he refers to his younger brother, our goalkeeper. “I don’t know why he thought Bria would be different for you. Hopeless romantic, that one. The team should have started a tally on how many birds you’ve dated in the past few years. I’ve never seen a bloke serial date as much as you. It’s like you’re on a mission to find every single female in London.”
I shake my head at that grim take on my dating status. Bria was the closest I’ve come to someone I could actually see being with long term. She was smart, loved to travel, and enjoyed cooking. She ticked all the boxes I thought I’d want in a partner. But…there was no spark. My Italian nonno once told me that la famiglia is everything. They are your every day, always. And if I am with a woman who I care about, I should tend to her the same way I attend to my basil plant on my balcony…with love, care, and plenty of water. If I am with a woman who I don’t want in my every day, always…I must stop watering that plant and let it go. Unfortunately, Bria wanted a sprinkler system installed.
I shoot Tanner a dubious look. “I have to admit that picking up random birds at nightclubs with you Harris Brothers was a lot more fun.”
Tanner laughs. “We had some top nights. However, I can’t say I truly miss them. Going to bed at eight o’clock with Belle has more perks than I’d ever imagined. Seriously Santino, if you find a woman who’ll be your small spoon, you better not toss her after your two-month test run. Spooning is life.” Tanner waggles his eyebrows playfully before turning on his heel and calling over his shoulder, “See you later.”
As soon as he’s gone, I immediately exhale the tension I hadn’t realised I was holding in my shoulders. Just the mention of Tilly’s name has thrust me back to moments of the past. Moments that I’ve tried for years now to forget. Christ, what’s it been…four, five years?
Tilly and I met at a nightclub in Soho just after Mac signed on with Bethnal Green. I was out partying with the team as I often did back then, and Mac’s sister showed up to meet him, and well… let’s just say she didn’t leave that night with her brother.
I swallow the knot in my