falls into his neck as his arms shelter me with warmth. His hand combs through my tangled hair as our chests slide against each other, our breaths fighting to regulate again. It’s several moments before either of us can manage a coherent thought.
“We missed the sunset,” he says, his voice gruff from our exertions.
“Your fault.” I laugh and glance behind me to see the sun has disappeared behind the autumn landscape. I turn back to see him checking me out.
He cheekily fixes my bra so the cups are back in their rightful place. “I can’t believe I’m about to say this, but I’m hungry.”
We both laugh and clean ourselves up quickly because, like it or not, we are in a public place. Lord knows who could come upon us at any moment. The twilight is beautiful as we nibble on some fresh fruit, and for some bizarre reason, my mind drifts to something I’ve been meaning to talk to him about for the past few weeks.
“Listen, I know this is awkward because we haven’t really spoken about it very much,” I say, turning to sit crisscross so I’m facing Santino straight on. “But that money you sent me back in Dundonald for the private investigator? I want to pay you back.”
“What?” Santino asks, popping a grape into his mouth and frowning at me. His hair is mussed from my hands, and he looks like sex on a stick leaning back on the tree with one leg propped.
“It’s weighed heavily on me for a long time. I’m getting a really nice signing bonus at Harrods, so I’d like to just get that sorted.” Waving him off, I dig into the basket for more fruit.
He stops eating and stares at me with a peculiar look on his face. “Tilly, I don’t want your money. I don’t need it.”
“I know you don’t need it,” I reply firmly. “It’s a pride thing for me. This has eaten away at me for ages, and now that we’re together properly, I don’t want this between us anymore.”
“It was never between us.” His nostrils flare. “I’d already forgotten about it.”
“Well, I didn’t.” I blink at him, confused with why he’s being so stubborn about this.
The muscle in his jaw tics. “Just donate it to a charity then.”
“You donate it. It’s your money,” I exclaim, crossing my arms over my chest. “I have the check already written.”
“I won’t take it.”
“Why not?”
“Because I won’t.” He slides his gaze from me and stares out at the view like the discussion is over.
I watch him curiously for a moment, that doubt from earlier creeping back in with a vengeance. “Why did you give it to me in the first place?”
“What do you mean?” he snaps, narrowing his eyes on me. “I was trying to help you.”
“But it was above and beyond what any other bloke would do.”
“So what?”
“So, I’m curious why. There must have been some sort of reason,” I pry deeper, wanting to know every single part of him now more than ever.
“Why does there have to be a reason?” he growls, his anger bubbling to the surface.
I pause as I stare back at him. “Because there has to be a reason. Just like there has to be a reason you used to like celebrating birthdays as a child, but you don’t anymore.”
“Tilly.” His jaw clenches as he glowers at me. “We don’t need to discuss this. None of it matters.”
That response only makes me more determined. “Look, I’ve tried to be patient and let you share with me when you’re ready, but that’s clearly not happening, so what am I supposed to do here?”
“Just leave it alone.” His tone is harsh and final. “You don’t need to know absolutely everything about me.”
His words hit me with a deep, penetrable force that I did not see coming. I don’t need to know everything about him? Which means there is something he’s hiding from me. Something important or his mother wouldn’t have looked at me the way she did earlier today.
“You’re actually serious?” I clench my teeth with frustration, a chill running down my spine at his closed-off body language. It’s so foreign to me, this entire exchange so unlike anything we’ve experienced together thus far.
“Of course, I’m serious.” He shakes his head in disgust and that sets me off.
“Right.” I toss a berry out into the grass and stand because I can’t sit here and take this any longer. “So, these past several weeks, I’ve had to answer loads of