been six years, it still feels the same, like we were never apart. When his gaze moves to me, my breath hitches, and his touch lingers, tattooing its mark on my skin.
“I can accept that, but please know, a boy needs his father, and I’m willing to make things right. I want to be a part of his life and yours.”
There are so many words going through my mind. I had a list of things I wanted to say and the order I wanted to say them.
That is until Clayton opens his mouth again.
“I love him, Ashley, and I still love you. No matter what, I’m always going to love you.” His hand lifts to his chest, resting against the side where his heart beats. “This is where you belong. This is where you and Alex belong.”
“How can you love him?” I shout and stand from the chair. “How? You don’t know him the way I do.” My tone turns accusatory. “You weren’t there when his heart beats filled the room. You weren’t there when I heard him crying for the first time. You weren’t there when he took his first breath. You weren’t there for his first cold or when he said “mama” or when he started crawling, walking, and running. You missed out on all his firsts.”
“I know.” Clayton stands as well and keeps his distance. “I know. You don’t need to stand there and remind me of everything I missed. I regret the way I told you to leave. It’s always been on my mind. I want to know everything, but Ashley, I couldn’t bring myself to write you back or call you.”
“Why now?”
“I’m here now because I’ve realized I missed out on the most precious years with you and our son. I needed to leave Seattle and headed home.” I pause and gather what I need to say. “My dad had a stroke. It was touch and go for a while. He was in the hospital, and my mom was a wreck. She wasn’t able to focus on anything, so I did what I had to do. It was a long road to recovery for him. I took his place at the company, and from there, I stayed with my family, helped my mother, and made sure he got back on his feet. From there, Nolan and I began planning our company, and once my dad was healthy again, we brought the company to life here in Seattle.”
“I’m sorry about your dad. I’m glad he’s healthy. Listen, I get that you had to leave and be there for your family. I won’t hold that against you. You still should’ve tried to reach out and let me know you wanted to meet him and be there.”
“Thank you. I appreciate that.” He steps closer, and I’m frozen where I’m standing. “I know I should’ve been there for you. I’m sorry. I had to keep my head clear and run a business. I had no idea what I was doing. There was this weight on my chest, and I had to do things right. I don’t want to miss out on more years. Please. Please, can you reconsider?”
I shake my head, biting my lower lip, trying to piece together everything he’s asking. The heartbreak that is Clayton Turner is still there. I’ll never forget his demeanor when he told me to take care of the problem. Standing here with Clayton and listening to him plead to be in our lives isn’t happening. My fingers rub my forehead, pushing away the pending headache.
“No.”
“No?”
“Why do you care?” I fire, and once those words leave my lips, Clayton’s appearance changes. His eyes are shooting darts into mine. “Huh? Why?”
“Because.” His tone is dangerously low. “Because I’m trying to make things right, and I want to take the high road and talk to you. I want to be a part of his life. It may be too late for you to forgive me, but it’s not too late for a father to be in his son’s life. He’s my son.”
“I thought he was your problem. I mean, isn’t that what you referred to him as?”
“Yes,” he states. “Yes, I did. I’m man enough to say I fucked up, and I shouldn’t have let you walk out the door.” The hurt is evident in his tone, and it’s tearing me apart. “Please give me a chance, Ashley. That’s all I’m asking. You make the calls. You tell me when I can see him and