most confident tone, making a promise I had every intention of keeping.
I should have known that, eventually, Mac wouldn’t feel the same.
New Year, New Me
Mac
I
’d spent the last few days holed up in Sunny’s house with her parents. They made it ridiculously easy to feel like I belonged there even if all their attention was a little uncomfortable. I wasn’t used to being taken care of. The way they fawned all over me, fed me nonstop, and made sure my face healed properly with constant ice and Advil. Plus, I got to play and walk the dogs whenever I wanted, which made me insanely happy. I couldn’t believe I’d never had a dog before, and now, all I wanted was one. Or five.
Nah, just one.
Sunny made a good point one afternoon while we were walking two of the dogs. Dayton was already at the baseball house, a good week before we had to report in for baseball, and I was considering going back too. But Sunny suggested that I stay away from Fullton until at least the bruises faded. They were almost gone, but a nice purple hue still shaded part of my jaw toward my mouth.
When she offered to cover it up with makeup, I told her, “Thank you, but no chance in hell.”
She said that people would buy the car accident and air bag story, but that it would lead to a lot of questions and unwanted attention, especially as long as I couldn’t eat solid foods, which I was still struggling with. My jaw fucking ached, and the force of my dad’s blows had caused some of my teeth to loosen. They were tightening back up on their own though—something I’d had no idea that teeth had the ability to do, but I was grateful for it. I couldn’t imagine if my teeth had fallen out.
When Sunny also added that my coaches would freak out when they heard about the accident and demand to see me, interrogate me, and possibly sit me out if they thought it was in my best interest, I realized that staying out of sight until I had to report back for practice was a necessity. The last thing I needed was my coaches worrying about my family situation and my state of mind regarding it. Especially now that I’d handled it. I’d left. There was nothing to work out, analyze, or discuss.
I talked to my mom about once a day. She was still hiding out in the hotel under a fake name, refusing to leave until she figured out what she was going to do. I could tell that her resolve was weakening with each day that passed. I thought she felt trapped and knew that she couldn’t live in a hotel forever. It wasn’t realistic. DD would eventually find her, if he hadn’t already. At some point, she would have to check out and face her future head-on. I thought the idea terrified her. She’d been living a certain way for so long that she’d grown used to it.
I tried not to be mad at her, but it was hard. I knew that if she went back to DD, I’d have to cut her out of my life, too, and the thought alone gutted me. Sunny kept telling me to have a little faith in her and give her time, but the truth was, I didn’t have faith in her to do the right thing even if I wanted to. I just … didn’t.
When we walked back into her parents’ house, we let the dogs off their leashes, and the other six jumped up, wanting a turn.
“Being a dog walker’s a full-time job,” I said as I hooked another dog up to the leash I was still holding.
“You guys don’t have to walk them all,” her mom said as she rounded the corner, hands on her hips. “I’m making you an assortment of mushy foods, Mac. I found a blog online!” She sounded so excited, and it made me smile. Which still hurt too.
Was my face ever going to stop aching with every movement?
“We’ll be right back. These are the last two,” Sunny said as we turned around to head right back out the way we’d just come in, the necklace I’d given her reflecting the sunlight. It looked so beautiful.
I held Sunny’s free hand as we walked our dogs with the other hands.
“I know I said you shouldn’t go back yet, but I only meant the baseball house,” Sunny started