and runs his fingers through his hair, scrubbing his head when he’s done. His face is tipped downward toward the deck as he massages his neck, so I can’t read his expression. But then he lifts his eyes to mine and gives me a sad smile. “Congratulations?”
His words are like a knife right through my heart. The floodgates open and the tears come flowing out unchecked.
“Wrong answer,” I choke out before turning around to walk back into the house.
He’s faster than I am. He grabs my wrist and pulls me back. The force he uses is strong enough that it sends me flying into his chest. He wraps his strong arms around me and squeezes tight, kissing me on the top of the head like a father might do to his daughter. “You’re not going anywhere.”
I struggle to be free. “Let me go, Ozzie. I don’t want to be here.”
“Too bad. This is where you are and this is where you’re going to stay until I say so.”
I don’t like his choice of words. It triggers something in me. I start screaming and struggling, punching him on the back so he’ll let me go.
He immediately thrusts me away from him, but keeps a strong grip on my shoulders. He bends over and looks into my eyes, his face only inches away. “Stop. Stop it right now.”
I freeze, knowing in that moment how a deer standing in front of a set of headlights feels. I’m afraid, but I don’t know what of. Is it Ozzie or myself? I’m too messed up in the head to be sure.
He’s glaring at me. “You need to get ahold of your emotions right now.”
I speak through trembling lips, my voice nearly a growl. “Don’t tell me what I have to do. You don’t own me.”
His expression softens as does his grip on me. “I know that. You know that I know that.” He shakes his head and hisses out a long breath. “Toni, you’ve gotta talk to me.” He lets me go and we stand there, facing off against each other. “You know that I’m here for you, but I can’t do anything to help if you won’t calm down and talk to me.”
I can’t stop my stupid chin from quivering or my lips from trembling, and the tears don’t want to quit either. This has got to be the pregnancy taking over my body again, because the normal non-pregnant Toni would never be such a wimp. I hate being pregnant; it’s official now.
“I came here to talk to you, but apparently I can’t.”
He sounds hurt. “Why not?”
“I don’t know!” I look left and right, the desire to run filling every inch of me. “I don’t know what’s going on in my life anymore! Everything is changing and I hate it!”
He reaches up and strokes my upper arms, his touch much more gentle this time. “I get it. I get that this is scary for you. Hell, it’s scary for me.” He gives me a goofy smile and chuckles. “But we’re going to be okay. You’re going to be great.” He leans in a little. “So tell me . . . what’s going on with Lucky?”
I throw my arms up, dislodging his hands. “I don’t know! He found out that I was pregnant and moved in.” I seriously want to kick something, but the only thing available is Ozzie’s shins and he doesn’t deserve that.
Ozzie frowns. “Moved in? To your house?”
“Yes!” My eyes are practically bugging out of my head. “He just showed up with all his shit and demanded to be let in. He said he’s moving in, but I am not okay with that.”
Ozzie nods. “I get that. I wouldn’t be okay with it either.”
“Thank you!” I let out a long, shaky breath, finally feeling some peace seeping into my bones. “That’s what I said. I mean, this is not the Middle Ages. A man can’t decide for me how to live my life or who my roommate is going to be.”
Ozzie continues to nod. “I get it. You’re absolutely right. You want me to talk to him?”
I am about to say yes, but I stop myself. Do I really need Ozzie fighting my battles for me? I bite my lip.
“If you don’t want me to, just say so. But if you want me to, I will.” Ozzie puts his hands up like he’s surrendering. “I’m here to help you out, that’s it.”
“This pregnancy is totally messing with my brain. I can’t even