idea. I like Jackson and might want to hang out with him again someday.”
Whitley laughs harder before Viking walks up to us. Viking pulls me in close and leans down to my ear.
“I love you Carnie.”
Nothing else needs to be said. We are now in our own little world. Being in his arms feels like the world has shifted and brought us even closer together.
Everything about him feels right.
Everything about us feels right.
Chapter 29
VIKING
“I’m surprised you can walk this mornin’,” I tease Carnie as she takes the last of her bags out to the truck. She smiles and sticks her tongue out at me. “I’m surprised you can,” she snaps back.
I shake my head and blow out a ring of smoke as I lean against the side of the clubhouse. I can’t believe today is the day I have to say goodbye to her. I can’t believe I’m actually doing this. I know it’s for the best I can handle, but actually dropping her off? That’s something else. I know I wanted her to have her life, but this is fucking hard.
My heart keeps twisting up in knots and it doesn’t want to stop. My stomach feels like it’s weighted down with lead. I know it’s the right thing to do, but I’m being a selfish bastard in my head. I want to keep her here and I know if I said the word that she’d stay.
Which is exactly why I’m keeping my mouth shut. Everyone has already said their goodbyes except for Fin. He stands at the back of the truck and his eyes never leave her. I suppose it’s just as hard on him as it is on me. I watch Carnie walk toward him and her tears are falling. He scoops her up into his arms and holds her tightly. He’s whispering his goodbye under his breath.
When she turns to me I almost lose it. I almost snap and say fuck it to this entire thing. She’s come a long way in this world, but holding her back is not a fucking option.
“You ready?” I ask her when Fin walks her toward me.
She nods her head and wipes away the tears on her cheeks.
“Take care of her Viking,” Fin warns me.
I nod once and lead her back to the truck. She climbs in and I close the door behind her. Fin watches with teary eyes ready to leak out at any second, but he reins them in.
“She’s got this Fin. We’ll drink it up when I get back yeah?”
Fin nods his head and turns to head back inside. He’s no doubt too upset to actually watch us leave. I jump in the truck and put it in drive. We ride in silence for a majority of the trip. I’m lost in my head and Carnie is no doubt lost in her sorrow. We both know that this is the right thing to do, but it doesn’t hurt any less to do it.
The idea of her being so far away doesn’t sit right with me, but I also promised Fin that if she met someone else that I’d let her go. I’ll make good on that promise if it kills me. If it’s the last thing I do I will let her decide her own future from now on.
We arrive at the college and I unload her things and take them to her dorm. I got a lot of strange looks doing it, but I ignored them all. I don’t give a shit what anyone thinks about us. She’s mine and that’s never going to change. Even if she finds someone else I will always know that she was mine first. We stand next to the truck and her eyes are distant. I run my hands up and down her arms.
“Can I ask you for a favor?” she finally speaks. “Always.”
“Can you just not make any more decisions about us until I’m out of school?”
Like she even had to ask that? I’d rather cut off my left nut than to lose her.
“That’s an easy promise to make, but I’ll need one in return,” I tell her.
“What is it?”
“If you find someone else I want you to go for it. I don’t want you holdin’ back because of me Carnie. You’re gonna meet new people and make new friends.”
Before I can even continue she shoves my chest. I stumble back a few steps as I wasn’t ready for that.
“What the fuck was that for?” I growl ready to throw