Do you have any idea how bad you fucked me over? Do you even care?”
“I just want what’s best for you. It’s all I’ve ever wanted. Look at you. Who is the man standin’ in front of me drunk and high? ’Cuz he’s not my son. I don’t even recognize you anymore. You wanna walk the line, Cash, then you do it on your own. I won’t stand by and watch you ruin your life.”
I held my head higher, fighting like hell not to crumble.
“Your father is right, Cash.”
My eyes narrowed, drifting my stare toward my mother.
“You cannot show up here drunk and high and expect him not to react. It’s not fair. You’re hurting him, us, just as much as you feel like he’s hurting you. Two wrongs don’t make a right. You’re so much like your father, it’s almost scary. Since you were a boy it’s been your biggest hurdle to overcome. I can’t protect you anymore. Not with this. The drinking, the drugs, who are you right now?”
“You’re turnin’ against me too?”
“I’m sorry you see it that way, but I cannot support this, Cash. You want to drink and do drugs? I am powerless to stop you. I’ve turned a blind eye too many times that you’ve come home smelling exactly like you do now. Look what good that’s done. I cannot enable you anymore.”
“Unbelievable. This how it’s gonna be? Then by all means, I don’t need you. Either of you. You know what? This is peachy fuckin’ keen. It just makes things easier.”
Slowly, I stepped back and announced, “I dropped outta school today, and I’m goin’ on the road.”
Hammering the final nail in my coffin.
Chapter 14
“The most important kind of freedom is to be what you really are.”
-Jim Morrison
<>Cash<>
I walked down to the beach behind the building to be alone. Sitting in front of the ocean, I watched the waves of water drift up toward the shore. The sky made a scenic panoramic view over the water. All the colors of the night and moon blended together, forming the beauty amongst the darkness.
I sat there, listening to the soft lull of waves dragging me into its calming rhythm, bringing a sense of peace over me.
The ocean was my old man’s happy place. He grew up on a surfboard in Oak Island. The irony was not lost on me.
I didn’t know how much time went by when suddenly I heard the sand shuffling behind me. I didn’t have to wonder who it was for very long. A tiny shadow quickly appeared in front of me.
Without turning, I asked, “Journey, do your parents know you’re down here?”
She nodded, sitting up on her knees in front of me. A wet rag in her hands.
“My mommy watched me walk down. You’re still bleeding.”
I licked my bloody lip. “He hits like a girl.”
Despite my attempt to make light of the debacle she witnessed, she didn’t smile.
Giggle.
Nothing from the little girl I was used to.
“What are you doin’ down here?”
Not saying a word, she brought the rag up to my lip, and I resisted the urge to hiss at how bad it fuckin’ stung. Slowly and carefully she cleaned up my wound.
“Darlin’, I’m alright. You don’t gotta take care of me.”
“Then who’s going to?”
“I don’t need anyone to take care of me. I’m grown, yeah?”
Her crystal blue eyes locked with mine, and it was the first time I realized how white they’d get when she’d cry.
“Don’t cry for me, Junie.”
“That was really bad. It scared me.”
“I know.”
“It made me really sad for you.”
“I know.”
She set the rag down on the sand and grabbed something out from her book bag.
“I got you a present.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yeah. You gave me one, so I wanted to get you one too.”
Cocking my head to the side, I questioned, “What was that?”
“This.” She pulled out the backstage pass from her backpack, making me chuckle.
“I told you I’d keep it forever and ever. It’s the best present anyone has ever given me.”
I grinned, tugging on the end of her hair.
“This is for you.” Opening her hand in between us, she showed me a black guitar pick with a silver letter J engraved on it.
I was taken aback. Not knowing what to say, what to feel. No one had ever given me anything like this before. No one ever cared enough to.
“Where did ya get this?”
“Mommy took me to a guitar store.”
“She know this was for me?”
“Yes. I told her I wanted to get you something nice.”
“I see.”
“Will you use