I give commands?
But I need to get off the island to break the curses, and this is the best shot I have at it. All that matters is that I find the artifact.
And for that reason, I exhale a deep breath and bow my head. “I can.”
The relief in Mother’s sigh squeezes my guilty heart. Her eyes water as she brings our connected hands to her lips, kissing them before setting her forehead against them. Under her breath, she whispers a quiet prayer I can’t fully make out.
She leans away and releases my hands. “You’re the queen now. The seas are rough this time of year, and we’re only just beginning to understand this new state of our kingdom. I need you to promise you’ll be more careful than ever. None of that.” She gestures toward Rukan, still sheathed at my hip.
I force myself to nod even though it’s perhaps the biggest lie I’ve told today. “Of course. And I’ll bring the strongest crew Visidia has to offer.”
“I’ll have my mind speakers watch over you, too,” Mother says. “No matter where you are, I’ll have eyes on you. Should anything happen, I’ll have you brought home or soldiers deployed right away. Bring Ferrick, all right? And that boy, too.” I hate the pitying way she says it. It awakens an angry heat within me, and I peel my hands away from her at the mention of Bastian.
“It’s not like it’s possible to leave without him.” The words hold every ounce of bitterness I feel. This time, I don’t bother attempting to contain it. “Believe me, I’ve tried.”
She lifts her hand as if to set it on my shoulder, then hesitates and returns it to her side. The movement’s enough to snatch my breath, reminding me so sharply of Father. I feel the ghost of his hand on my shoulder. The single squeeze—just one—and my knees nearly buckle. It’s everything I can do to pretend like I didn’t notice. To pretend that I’m fine. That Father didn’t die and leave me with a broken kingdom in his wake.
“I would never wish what happened to you on my worst enemy.” Mother folds her hands before her and as far from my shoulders as possible. Distracted as I am by the ghost of Father’s touch, her words are distant. If I focus hard enough, it’s almost like I can smell him—a familiar scent of sea and sandalwood. I can nearly feel the lingering warmth of the sun on his skin as he returned from a day out on The Duchess.
If only he were still here.
The sound of Mother lifting herself off the chaise stirs me, and Father’s ghost slips away once more, out of reach. “I’ll leave the crew to you, and you leave the planning and the fanfare to me. You’ll set sail in two days’ time.” She bends to kiss the top of my head. “Sweet dreams, Amora.” And then she’s gone, the door shutting quietly behind her. Only then does Aunt Kalea lift her head to look at me fully. I stare back, smothering my resentment.
“You need to take care of her.” I am a snake with venom so lethal that even my words are deadly. “I don’t care what you have to do, or what it comes down to. You’ll protect her with your life.” With Mother gone, I no longer care about civility. My aunt flinches but doesn’t protest. She deserves every ounce of my anger and more.
“Keira’s strong,” she says. “Focus on yourself instead of worrying for her.”
I have to bite back the laughter as it roils deep and vicious within me. “Let me worry about fixing my kingdom. That’s what you always wanted, after all.”
Again, she takes the insults in stride, which causes something within me to sear and fester. I want her to bite back, to fight me. What happened is as much her fault as it is mine, and there’s nothing more I want than for her to know it. To scream it at her over and over again, and bury my anger so deeply within her that she feels every last drop of it.
But she doesn’t fight me, nor does she bite back. Kalea takes my punches one after another, snuffing the blazing fire right out of me. When I speak again it’s no longer with wrath, but with the coldness of facts. “I’ve no intention of returning until my people are willing to fall on swords for me. In my absence, I’m