to capture it. To remember the feeling of his soft, contented breaths. The way his body feels against my skin. How he combs his fingers through my curls, wrapping them around calloused fingers.
He’s more vulnerable than I’ve ever known him to be, and I can’t help but wonder what would happen next between us. If the snake scale weren’t waiting, where would Bastian and I go from here?
“You have something planned.” He speaks the words against my neck, sending chills down my spine and goose bumps along my arms. “I trust you, Amora. We all do. But we’re also worried about you. Is this … Is it about what we saw in Nelly’s memories? About the choice her father made?”
I still, and for a moment Bastian tenses as if he’s worried I might pull away. But I don’t, even while guilt weighs my stomach like lead.
“Kaven changed the landscape of this kingdom forever.” I keep my voice flat. “Our people no longer trust me to lead them, even if I’m one of the few who knows the truth behind our history. I’m trying to help fix the damage my family has done. But if Visidia knew the truth about the Montaras … there’s no way they’d listen to anything I say. With the artifact, I could have a chance to change things. I have a chance to fix Visidia.”
“Amora.” Instinct makes my body relax at the way my name sounds coming from his lips. I shut my eyes, focusing on how his fingers toy with my curls as he talks. “Sometimes, beautiful things come from our most painful experiences. Before your reign, Zudoh was nearly wiped out. The Kers were killing themselves by trading time off their lives to Blarthe, just for the possibility of one day having their homes back. Magic was being kept from our people.
“Your family made mistakes that changed the history of this kingdom, you’re right,” he continues. “But if you don’t tell them the truth, what makes you any better than the rest of them? No Montara ever gave Visidia a choice until you took the throne. I know it’s hard, and I know … I know you have the power to do some things that look pretty appealing right now. But the Amora I know? She’d do whatever it took to give her people their freedom. To give them the future they deserve. And that’s the Amora I’m in love with.”
A knot coils tight in the center of my chest, making the words even more difficult to grit out. “I miss him, Bastian. I feel like, if he were here, he’d know what to do about all of this. I feel like he could fix everything.”
Bastian presses his forehead to the back of my neck and kisses the skin there with a gentle sigh. “You don’t need his help; you already know what needs to be done. The king may have been a loving father, but he was not a great ruler. He fixed nothing. He would have done whatever was best for him and his family alone. You’re not like that; you can’t be. Visidia may be changing, but it’s only getting stronger. It may still be finding itself, but one day it will stabilize again, I promise you.”
The king may have been a loving father, but he was not a great ruler. The words strike something within me, fierce and gutting. My entire body tenses, thinking back to the serpent scale once more. All I need is someone who can use time magic, and Father’s as good as alive. In two days, my entire world could change, and I could have him back.
All my life I believed I was made to sit on Visidia’s throne, but being on it now, I know with certainty I’m as wrong for the throne as Bastian believes Father was.
I suppose the real question then is which one of us is worse.
“Do you think he could have been a good king?” At first, I’m not sure my words even come out, they’re so quiet. “If I’d gone straight to him about Kaven, do you think he would have listened? That there’s a reality where he would have taken our side?”
Bastian’s hesitation is enough of an answer, though it’s not the only one he gives. “I think your father’s love for you was so great that he didn’t even know what to do with it. He knew you idolized him. I think the last thing he would ever