when they screwed up and yet had any of them waited long to apologize?
Even Hudson had come to me that first night with a peace offering and apology filled in a bag of Thanksgiving leftovers.
“Your family is sometimes a lot for me to take in,” I admitted, keeping my back to David. “I’m not used to so much kindness.”
“It hurts this old man’s heart for what you’ve gone through.”
I swallowed down the thick ball of emotions growing in my throat.
With tears in my eyes, I turned to David and let him see what those words meant to me because it was obvious he meant every single word of them. It shone in those sad eyes of his I now understood so well.
The door opened and I sniffed back tears, prepared myself for Brandon and Jenna and Hudson.
Inhaling the garlicky scent from whatever was cooking in the oven as I did, I chewed on my bottom lip and turned to David.
Quietly, I asked, “Perhaps someday soon, you could give me cooking lessons?”
He pressed his lips together. “It’d be my honor, Lilly.”
I nodded at him and took a sip of my water as Hudson walked into the kitchen and then I froze at the sight of him. Dark jeans that looked brand new hung from his hips and showed off the strength of his thighs. His dark gray dress shirt, perfectly and most likely recently pressed, was tucked into the waist of them but the shirt only highlighted the expanse of his chest, the firmness of it I had such intimate knowledge of. My cheeks heated as I took him in, all his dark, brute coloring and strength so much like a warrior ready to battle at any given moment.
He was so attractive. So handsome. So undeniably sexy. Pleasure sparked in my blood at the mere sight of him, and I barely contained myself as his dark eyes widened in surprise.
“You’re here,” he said and he didn’t sound upset about it. He sounded pleased. With the shock slowly fading of seeing me, he stepped toward me, an arm extended like he wanted to pull me in for a hug.
But I was there for David, and after Hudson realized I was, his opinion of me might change. I stepped back even though I missed those arms and that comfort he gave me. “David invited me.”
He took in the minuscule step I took away from him, not near him, and glanced between the two of us. That smile quickly fell and diminished altogether. “What’s going on?”
David took a large gulp of his alcohol and set it on the kitchen counter. “Family dinner.”
He went to Hudson and slapped him on the shoulder, whispering something I couldn’t hear but by the way Hudson’s expression changed, it was good, because his shoulders fell and he glanced back at me, saying nothing, but nodded at whatever advice David gave me.
I shuffled on my feet and gripped my bottle so hard the plastic cracked. On a good day his inspection sent butterflies to my stomach but today they were hornets buzzing. And when they let loose, I wasn’t sure I wouldn’t end up bent over the toilet, vomiting all my emotions and fears and regrets.
David pulled back and glanced at both of us. “If you’ll excuse me for a moment.”
I had no doubt he had nothing to do but was giving us privacy.
There was no need.
Until he destroyed Hudson in a matter of moments, I wasn’t sure we had anything to say but standing with him, so close, so far, the mild scent of his cologne wafting between us along with the secret I now kept made me dizzy.
“I’m glad you’re here,” he said. “It’s good to see you.”
I sucked my bottom lip into my mouth and nodded. If any words came out, I might blurt out everything. Your dad has cancer. You might lose another person you love. How do I keep you safe from any more loss?
Because I wanted to and that revelation was so startling it almost swept me off my feet.
I opened my mouth to speak, terrified of what would come out when the front door opened again immediately followed by Brandon shouting, “Hot damn, it smells good in here! I am fucking starving!”
I laughed and Hudson grinned at me, eyes softening in a way I hadn’t seen in so long and missed so much. “Your laugh is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever heard.”
He gave me his back and pulled Jenna into a hug