was minutes away and I was sitting cross-legged and calm on my bedroom floor, surrounded by pillows. For some reason I didn’t want to be in my bed. Usually any deviation in routine upset me, but tonight I felt strangely empowered by the change.
When I Shifted, my composure came with me; it only took a few seconds to adjust to being in my Roxbury body. As the adrenalin faded, I faintly heard the end of the sentence Ethan had started before my last Shift.
‘… so sorry.’
I kept my eyes closed until I was ready, then I lifted my head and opened my eyes, taking slow, steadying breaths. The only way to manage this situation was to stay in control.
Everything was exactly as it had been when I left. I was in the clinic. It was midnight. The clock lying on the bed now read 12.10 a.m. And Ethan sat wide-eyed and frozen.
I felt a stab of annoyance and narrowed my eyes, taking him in. His eyes were more shadowed than I remembered. He looked exhausted. His front teeth were firmly embedded in his bottom lip, moments from drawing blood. I glanced down at his hand, still holding his wristwatch mid-air. Was it trembling? He looked tired and worried, but it was more than that. He looked … sorry.
And he was beautiful.
I stared at him, his dark hair a messy bird’s nest, his full lips teasing me, his eyes showing a depth of soul I’d never seen in another person. Like he knew something the rest of us didn’t. A part of me began to ache.
As I watched, he glanced down at his hand. It was still shaking slightly. He lowered it to his lap. ‘Sabine,’ he whispered.
I felt an overwhelming urge to be closer to him. I cleared my throat. ‘It’s okay. I know it’s after midnight.’
‘Does that mean you …?’
I ran my hands through my shaggy dark hair, pushing it off my face. ‘Just listen before I forget. I’m tired, Ethan, and what you did to me … it …’ But I couldn’t even explain. I shook my head and went on, ‘Fifteen plus eleven equals twenty-six, and fifteen times eleven equals one hundred and sixty-five. The compound in chocolate that helps protect against cardiovascular disease is called flavonoids. It’s also in berries and red wine. The language was Latin and the words translate to “Treasure all life” or something like that. Nice touch.’
Before Ethan could say anything, I threw back the sheets and stood up. ‘Stay in your seat, take it all in. I’ll see myself to the bathroom. I promise I’m not hiding anything sharp or dangerous, but I need to go throw up. And if you ever try to control me at midnight again, you and I are not going to get on at all.’
I held it together until I was just out of the room, then I slapped a hand over my mouth and bolted for the bathroom.
I was only sick once, but I stayed in the bathroom for a while, giving Ethan time to absorb. The odd thing was, I thought I’d be feeling smug, but instead I was just nervous. Would he be waiting with a syringe and restraints when I got back? Would he even be there?
When I couldn’t put it off any longer, I padded back to my prison cell. Ethan was standing by the window. I stayed by the door.
He glanced at me over his shoulder. ‘I’m sorry I betrayed your trust, Sabine.’
I sighed. ‘Call it even for the Digoxin.’
He rolled his eyes. ‘Not exactly a fair trade.’
I shrugged and waited for him to say more.
Eventually he turned to me and gestured with his hand helplessly. ‘This is a lot to …’
‘Look, if this is the part where you tell me you need some time to … think or whatever, save it. My father already gave that speech. Sharp needles followed.’
He tilted his head. ‘Actually I was thinking I could do with a drink.’ He half laughed.
I couldn’t help the small smile. ‘Yeah, well, I second that. We should hit the local bar – you know, dance up a storm while we’re at it.’
He looked at me oddly, like I was an abstract painting he was trying to decide if he liked or not. Finally he moved past me towards the door, a look of playful mischief in his eyes.
‘Ethan?’
‘Get dressed. I’ll be back in two minutes.’ He left the room, closing the door behind him.
I didn’t hesitate, shimmying out