up exactly, but I had no fucking idea how long I was going to have to wait for her to come back. I’d told him she was busy with Plush Pets and Fur…nishings, and I wasn’t too proud to admit that, when I’d taken him out to lunch on Saturday, I’d gone the long way so we could drive past her warehouse. Her car was there, so I guessed it wasn’t a lie.
On Sunday afternoon, I was sitting on the back porch, watching Jack play with Jesse, when my phone dinged with an incoming message. I nearly fell out of my chair when I saw her name on the screen.
Lex: So just to be clear, are you giving me the silent treatment or am I giving you the silent treatment?
A tsunami of emotion crashed into me as I read it over and over again laughing like a maniac. It wasn’t that funny, but I was so damn relieved that she’d finally reached out.
Me: How ya doing, Kid?
Lex: I’ve been better. Any chance you want to beat up my boyfriend for me? I miss him and it’s been a week and he hasn’t called me or anything.
My chest got tight, and I scrubbed a hand over my face. I could have ended it right there, and as my fingers flew over the keyboard, I almost did.
Come over, I typed only to delete it.
You want to meet me and Jack for dinner? I deleted that too.
Time in. I wanted to send that one the most. But what would it have fixed?
There was no future for us while she was still holding on to the past. If I knew Lex half as well as I thought I did, that week apart had been hell on her too. That text was the olive branch, one I would have given anything to be able to accept.
Nothing had changed though. It would have been all too easy to pretend. If I just loved her hard enough, in time, maybe she wouldn’t have any room in her heart left to cling to his memory.
But even with as desperate as I was, that wasn’t fair to either of us. I deserved a woman who loved me completely, and she deserved a man who would wait until the end of time for her to be ready. I’d be miserable until she came back, but inviting her over and essentially putting a Band-Aid on a bullet wound wouldn’t solve anything.
Me: He’s probably just trying to give you some space. But if you don’t think it would be too much like him picking your splinters, I bet I could kick his ass until he agreed to text you more often.
Lex: That would be amazing. Try not to punch him in the dick though. I’d like for that to still be intact when I see him again.
I smiled, my whole damn face nearly splitting in half, and it had little to do with the thought of my dick and more about the seeing-her-again part. Yeah, okay, fine. My dick and seeing her again in the same thought didn’t hurt, either.
Me: I miss you so fucking much.
Lex: I love you, Hud.
Me: I love you too, beautiful. Come back to me.
Lex: I’m trying. I swear, I’m trying.
I didn’t reply that night, and neither did she. But I read that text more times in the following days than I would ever admit. It was my lifeline on the nights when doubts would invade my mind.
True to my word over the next few weeks, I checked in with her every couple of days.
Sometimes she’d reply and we’d talk for a while via text. Nothing about Brenden, the house, or the storage unit, but only regular day-to-day stuff.
Sometimes she would only reply with a single word, and as much as those days stressed me the fuck out, I hoped like hell those were the days she was making the most progress.
Either way, those interactions were nothing but a fix for an addict. I still craved her on every level.
The following week, she sent me a picture of the invoice for her very first cat condo sale.
I had flowers and a bottle of champagne delivered to her house. It stung, not being there to celebrate that with her. I wanted her to know how damn proud of her I was, but I didn’t trust myself to take it over in person. If I saw her and held her in my arms, there was a solid chance I’d never