place to go down that dark alley on memory lane.
And it never would be.
“Okay,” he relented. “I’m just saying they’d be lucky is all. Even if you do have an attitude and a sharp tongue, you’re easy to love too. I hope whoever he is can see the real you.”
His hand stretched out and landed on my thigh, causing me to freeze, but it had been so long since a real man had touched me in a way that made me feel like I was melting inside. It was far different from the non-feelings I’d had when I’d been with Craig. It should have been gross, like being on a date with Chase, my brother’s long-lost twin. Hell, it should have even made me want to slap him away like earlier with Hank.
But at the moment, it didn’t.
His thumb rubbed across my jeans, and for a second, I let my eyes fall shut. In that instant, I didn’t retreat, didn’t run away, didn’t want to hide or make it end. I just wanted to fucking be and have a brief glimpse, just a taste, of intimacy.
But the cold, hard truth was: Hudson had had way too much to drink. We weren’t who the other wanted; we were simply the only ones left. And I didn’t want a consolation prize any more than I wanted to be one. So after…probably too long, I cleared my throat and did what I had to do for both of us.
“It’s time you go in, Hud.”
Pulling away, he wiped his hand over his face and shook off the almost connection that never should have been.
“Yeah, you’re right.” He twisted in the seat and opened his door. “Um. Pick me up at six. That’ll get us there before noon.” He climbed out and looked as if he’d found his footing better than he had at the bar.
“Are you okay to make it inside by yourself?” I asked before he shut the door, all the while hoping he’d say yes. I wasn’t prepared to spend any more time with him that night.
“I’ll be fine. Drive safe.” He paused and flashed me a heart-stopping grin. Or at least, in that moment, it stopped mine. “Love you, Kid.”
Hudson had been calling me Kid dating back to when I had actually been a kid. I’d never so much as given it a second thought. Though, in my current state of what-the-fuck, I’d never in all my years hated that damn nickname more.
“Love you too, Hud.” I watched as he slowly lumbered around the house to let himself in through the back door. And when I saw lights come on inside, I pulled away and drove home.
The night had started out shitty, but after ditching Hank, the stage-five clinger, it had turned out not that bad. Still, as I closed my eyes, I pretended I couldn’t feel Hudson’s touch. I pretended he hadn’t said so many things I’d needed to hear. I pretended my body hadn’t reacted to his and that my heart wasn’t still racing.
But it was all for nothing, because no amount of pretending would change the fact that I’d liked it. And fuck if that wasn’t so inconvenient.
Me: Wake up, Sleepyhead. You were supposed to be at my house ten minutes ago.
Lex: I’m out front. You were supposed to be outside ten minutes ago. Unlike some people who shall remain nameless, I wasn’t drunk last night.
Me: Funny. I’m standing outside and you aren’t here.
Lex: Okay fine. I snoozed a few extra times. I’m at the stoplight about to turn into your neighborhood. Any chance you can bring me some coffee?
With two travel mugs sitting on the step beside me, I was way ahead of her. I’d woken up early, and after consuming approximately two rivers’ worth of water and a fist full of Advil, I’d gone for a run to clear my head and hopefully some of the lingering whiskey in my veins.
But there was nothing and I mean nothing that could clear my head of the memories of telling Lex all about her perfect ass and sexy mouth.
My personal favorite, a bile-inducing memory of that drive home through the Twilight Zone, was when I air-palmed her invisible ass. Just the fucking gesture had been bad enough, but secretly her boobs had been in my face when I’d imagined her sitting on top of me. That was one fun fact I was taking to the grave though. I owed her a serious apology and possibly free gold leafing