Mum.”
“Sure, did I say anything?” He pretends to push his black hair from his forehead. “In that case, is it okay if I fuck her?”
My hold tightens around the book, but I try to keep my expression the same. It’s a tool I’ve found works in most situations. If you stay calm, it’ll eventually go away.
If I tell Aiden no, he’ll figure out my fixation and use it against me every chance he gets.
But I know something… Silver can’t stand Aiden. She thinks we’re both wankers and doesn’t miss a single chance to tell us that. She wouldn’t touch him with a stick.
Besides, I have a way to make her hate him even more.
“Sure, if you’re into bimbos.” I smile.
“You and I both know she’s a not a bimbo.”
“Uh-huh.”
“You think I won’t be able to do it.” His smirk widens. “I love it when you underestimate me, Nash. I really, really do.”
“Be my guest.” I focus on the other two. “Hey, Ronan. Why don’t you tell Silver what we’re celebrating?”
“Oh, right.” Ronan pauses his fight with Xander and clears his throat. “Aiden lost his virginity to his father’s secretary yesterday. He’s finally a man.”
“I didn’t need to know that.” She makes a disgusted face as she opens the container on the counter.
Bingo. I just made Aiden lose before he started to play. That’s how it’s done.
“You fucked up, Nash,” Aiden murmurs to me. “Now, I’m taking this to the next level.”
I can’t resist the smug look that pulls at my lips. “Best of luck.”
“Hey, Ronan,” Aiden speaks in a neutral tone. “Why don’t you tell her the order of how we all lost our virginities?”
“Mais bien sûr.” Ronan points at himself. “I’m number one, of course — no need for applause — then Xan, and then Cole with the bombshell Miss Goldman, and the loser Aiden is last.”
Silver pauses opening a container, her fingers freezing on the handle.
Fuck.
The change in her demeanour is short, but it’s there. Her eyes are cast downwards, so I can’t see the look in them. However, she purses her lips for the briefest second before she goes back to normal, and by normal, I mean the mask she wears every time she gets up in the morning.
Silver Queens is the most popular girl at school.
A piano prodigy.
The school’s queen B.
And fake.
She’s so fake, I can taste the bitterness of it on my tongue.
“You guys are pigs,” she says with her haughty attitude, but there’s a slight tremble in her voice at the end.
“You insult me.” Ronan grabs her by the shoulder, speaking in a dramatic voice. “Pigs don’t have my package, love.”
“Thank God for that.” She slips from underneath his hold. “I’m going home. Papa’s waiting.”
“And we can have all the crisps?” Xander asks.
She waves a dismissive hand at him as she strolls into our area to pick up her backpack.
Aiden stands, giving me a sideways smirk. “Can your driver drop me off?”
No, thanks. She’ll say, no, thanks. That’s what she tells Aiden every fucking time.
“Sure.” She grabs her backpack with stiff fingers.
“Drop me off, too.” I stand.
For some reason, I feel that if she walks out with him through that door, everything will be screwed up, and it won’t be the chaos I love so much.
It’ll be chaos I can’t control, like when I was a kid, standing at the edge of the pool.
She snaps her head, finally looking at me. I wish she hadn’t. I’ve never seen that look in her eyes — malice mixed with hurt and disappointment and something else I can’t put my finger on.
Something so deep and raw, it’s almost like the time she pinned me to the bench and soaked my cheeks with her glitter tears because she couldn’t hold them in.
She’s not crying now, though, and that’s way fucking worse.
“You can go to hell,” she tells me as Aiden steps to her side.
She leans in to whisper, “You don’t know what I’m feeling right now, but I’m going to make you regret it.”
I reach out a hand for her, but all it finds is air.
The moment the door closes behind her and Aiden, something inside me slams shut too.
6
Silver
Aiden and I are at the back of Papa’s car, sitting side by side.
The moment Derek drives away from the Meet Up, my breathing turns faster and harsher, as if I’ve been running.
As if I’m climbing a mountain and have no way to get down. Then I’m falling and there’s no landing in sight. It’s a fatal fall, the