of his head tickle the inside of my thighs. Warmth floods my core. “You want that, right?” Cody asks, his lips tickling my pussy as he speaks. I raise my hips toward his mouth. More. I need more of him.
I can’t speak—the sensations are too much, so I take his head with both of my hands, grab him by the ears, and guide his face where I want it. He stops when he’s so close that I can feel his warm breath on me. “I need to hear you say it. What do you want, Lainey?” I’m frantically panting like a dog. I’m so hot for him. “This is what you want?”
“I want you, Cody,” I say, still with my hands on the sides of his stubbly face. “This. I want your mouth on me. I need your dick inside me. I want you. All of you.” That about covers it. This isn’t an old habit dying hard, this is me falling back down the rabbit hole. A druggie getting her hit of drugs. A woman grasping at the last shreds of a former life.
He smiles with his eyes, pleased with my dirty talk. “You’re so fucking wet for me,” he says, dipping a finger inside me. I keep my gaze fixated on his hand and sharp angles of his face, shadowed by the dim lighting. Even still, this man is akin to a dream. Or a nightmare. Right now, it’s both at the same time.
He settles between my thighs with his tongue licking small circles around my clit. I scream out. Not his name, no. I can’t even remember my own name. “Fuck, I’ve missed this. I want you. I want you so fucking bad that it hurts,” I rasp out, pulling his face into me. I melt into the couch when he slides his fingers inside me while continuing his assault with his tongue. He likes the encouragement, so I tell him exactly what I like and he groans in frustration. He wants to be inside me just as much as I want him to.
I arch my hips up to get his fingers as deep inside me as they’ll go and because I need more. “I’m about to come,” I whisper, gently bringing his face up so I can see his eyes. They’re shock blue and full of complete and utter satisfaction and hunger. Thankfully, he keeps his mouth on me and his fingers inside me. I repeat in a breathless whisper, “I’m about to come and I want your cock deep inside me when I do. Can you help me?”
He kisses me one more time on my clit, a long lingering press of his lips, and then says, “I thought you’d never ask. Let’s get you out of this dress so I can fuck you senseless.”
“Yes. Please. Yes,” I say, rolling over so he can unzip the dress equivalent of a straight jacket. I stand because there’s no way it’s coming off lying down and Cody slides it down over my hips and pulls it off in a couple of tugs. He runs his hands up my legs, traces a path with his fingertips up the sides of my stomach, and ends with his hands in my hair. My whole body is on fire. He gazes at me with such intensity that I’m not sure what to say. Or think. Or what I’m even supposed to do. “I want you so badly,” I say, returning his gaze. Can he feel this connection between us? “Not just tonight, Cody. I want you always.” His eyes turn down in the corner. Just like that, sadness replaces the worshipping look of love. “What is it?” I ask.
He kisses me instead of responding and I let him because I don’t want to hear the words. I’m playing pretend right now. Gently he backs me into the coffee table and lays me on it. I stumble a bit as the alcohol is still pumping through my veins like crazy. I hear him unbuckle his belt and watch as his slacks hit the floor. Cody’s cock is standing straight, thick and ready. “I’d say I want to make love to you, but that wouldn’t be appropriate now, would it? So let’s fuck for old times’ sake. One last time before…” he says, his voice cracking at the last word. Before what? Before I marry Dax. My fiancé. The cloud of alcohol lifts for a second and I’m appalled with my actions. This is