grin back up at me. She begins humming the star spangled banner around my cock and I’m certain that no matter what happens next, this is worth it.
It’s worth everything.
CHAPTER NINE
Lainey
VANITY IS A fundamental of human civilization. There are those who shun it, those who embrace it, and those who drip that shit from every pore on the surface of their bodies. More often than not, the people we’re trying to impress do not care. They just don’t. That vanity? It’s all for ourselves. Like a Christmas gift of undue stress you bought for yourself and can’t return. It’s funny the way it works. I’ve come to realize it’s vanity that has me in this situation to begin with. The mentality that I can have two amazing men at the same time has fucking vain roots. One day with Cody and I know I need to break up with Dax, call off the wedding and leave him bereft with grief. We didn’t even have sex. I mean, we did everything but, and I felt so much all at once. Chloe called it a nostalgia hookup, but it was so much more. That’s what makes things between Dax and I that much more complicated. It’s like a Band-Aid I just need to rip off. I just compared my relationship with Dax to a Band-Aid. What is wrong with me?
Cradling my cell phone on my shoulder, I type an email to Dax and speak to Marney. “Of course I can have the samples for you when we meet at the textile store. I’ll see you there in an hour,” I say. Marney tells me about a couch she saw in Cosmo and asks if I can find something similar, to which I agree, knowing there’s no way in hell she’ll want to pay for it. I jot down a couple notes on my planner and hang up the call. I read over the harmless email I typed to my fiancé and decide I’ll call him instead.
It rings twice and he gives me a breathless, “Hello.”
“Hey-ya,” I say, relieved and sick at the sound of his voice. How did this happen? Why?
“Lane,” Dax breathes. “Spare me the details.” I glance at my oversized watch and realize I probably interrupted him at the gym. The clank of weights confirms my suspicions. I choose to ignore the fact that he actually thinks I’ve called to give him the blow by blow about Cody. Literally. “We on for dinner tonight?” It’s Friday. It’s our date night.
“Sure, yeah.” It will be my opportunity to talk to him face to face. My stomach fills with dread.
Dax breathes out loudly. “I talked to him, you know? He called me and wanted to feel me out about the situation going on.”
Dread turns to fear. “Oh?”
“I told him the same thing I told you. How am I supposed to marry a woman who has unfinished business? I’m not sure how this is all going to shake out, but I want you to know that despite my misgivings about whatever is going on between the two of you, I’m okay. Don’t worry about me, Lainey. Seriously. I’ve made my choices…probably questionable ones, but I stand by them. I stand by you. He wants to take you away to the Hamptons.”
This is news to me. All of it. “He asked permission?”
“No. He’s trying to be as honorable as he can given the fact that you have my ring on your finger, Lainey.” I glance at the diamond, once a source of great joy, and have to swallow down bile.
“Well, I guess I’m just the town whore. I should stake out a corner in a dark alley and sell my services.” I’m half joking. I’m not a damsel in distress by any means. Not by a long shot.
“Don’t be melodramatic. I have to go finish up here. Tonight is mine,” he says, hanging up the call. Fuck. God dammit. There’s no question what I’ll be doing tonight. With Dax. Not Cody. I never thought I’d be the one unable to hold up the end of the two-timing relationship deal. I was the lucky one, right? I’ll have to talk to Dax before it gets to that. Since my afternoon with Cody I have a profound sense of cheating on him with Dax all this time. It’s nonsensical, of course. The laptop pings a new email alert. My heart leaps into my throat. It’s a note from Cody. When he was deployed, he would email