focus on one thing.
River…
That was his name.
Had she given my son my last name or hers? I swallowed, too nervous about what I might do to ask. “So, at what point did you think to tell me I had a fucking kid?” I inquired instead.
Squaring her shoulders, she lifted her chin. A moment later, I realized it was to keep from crumbling. “When he almost died.”
I froze as fear, disgust, and anger at both of us ripped through me. It was all I could do not to give in to the emotions by putting a fucking hole in the wall. I nearly lost him before I ever even knew I had him.
“And you didn’t tell me when you found out you were pregnant because…”
“I wanted to hurt you.”
Turning away from her, I watched my son stretch his tiny body and yawn as if he were already bored with the two of us and our bullshit. I didn’t blame him. “Congratulations,” I muttered as I stared at my son. “You fucking succeeded.”
“And I wanted to be free of you.”
I stiffened despite her low whisper. “So if he hadn’t almost died, you would have never told me?”
“I wasn’t planning on either of us being parents. We weren’t ready.”
More calmly than I would have given myself credit considering her revelation, I spoke. “I suggest you figure it the fuck out because you’re not giving up my kid, Bradley.”
“I’m keeping him,” she snapped. “You can do what you want. You always do.”
I didn’t bother to respond as I turned toward the crib. Even though I was terrified of hurting him, I couldn’t go another second without holding him. Carefully, I lifted River from his crib and felt warmth flood my chest and stomach. Meanwhile, my son stared at me the entire time as if I’d grown two heads. Sometimes, I felt as if I had. More and more, I felt my former self slipping away. I barely recognized the old me who have never considered crushing Tyra’s windpipe. What if River’s early arrival had been a desperate twist of fate? My son offering me a final chance at salvation?
I didn’t fear death, but I was scared shitless of disappointing him.
“If he was born three months ago,” I asked as I gently cradled him, “why is he still so small?”
I heard her deep inhale as if she needed to draw strength. “A premature baby develops the same outside the womb as they do inside. River might be three months old, but he’s still a newborn. He wasn’t even considered full-term until a few days ago.” I heard her shift nervously before she added, “My due date wasn’t for another couple of weeks.”
“What day was he born?”
“January fifth.”
I almost swore at how close I’d been to sharing a birthday with my son. Was it corny to wish that we had? I didn’t care. When I felt my hands start to shake, I quickly sat down on the sofa. I tracked every move he made and listened to every sound. In no time, I was utterly enthralled and completely fascinated by this little being.
“His last name?” I finally asked, keeping my gaze on River. He started crying the moment I tensed in anticipation. Tyra rushed over, and I let her take him from my arms, feeling helpless and clueless as I watched her soothe him before placing him back inside his crib.
“Rees,” she finally answered, her soft lips trembling even as my shoulders sagged with relief. I wondered if she regretted giving my son my last name.
River Rees.
My eyebrows rose at that, but I said nothing. The name she’d chosen was unusual, and I literally bit my tongue until it bled to keep from asking her why. I’d just managed to shake off the urge to know why when I caught sight of Four rounding the corner. Ever, along with a perplexed Jamie and Bee, were right on her heels.
If I could, I would have locked them out—Tyra included—so I could spend some much-needed alone time with my son. Unfortunately, the automatic door slid open, and they all poured in at once.
“HOLY SHIT,” JAMIE WHISPERED IN awe for the thousandth time since meeting River. He still hadn’t taken his eyes off the baby even though River had fallen asleep. For a while, he seemed to eat up all of the attention before getting bored and nodding off. “I can’t believe one of us has one of these. He’s fucking cute as hell.” With a twinkle in his