thumbs-up and a nod. Across from me, I found Jerkface staring at me, an inscrutable frown on his face.
“All right,” Cobb said, standing up. “Let’s stop wasting time. Helmets on.”
I grabbed my helmet and pulled it on, ignoring Jerkface’s stare. I immediately jumped, however, and pulled the helmet off.
“What?” Cobb said, limping over to me.
“The diodes inside are warm,” I said, feeling them. “What does it mean?”
“Nothing,” Cobb said. “. . . Probably.”
“That doesn’t reassure me, Cobb. What is going on?”
He lowered his voice. “Some medical types who think they’re smart believe they can tell from a bunch of readouts if you’re . . . going to run away like your father.”
“My father didn’t—”
“Calm down. We prove them wrong about you with good flying. That’s your best tool. Can you wear that?” He nodded to the helmet.
“Yeah. They aren’t painfully hot; I was just surprised.”
“Put it on then, and let’s get to work.”
21
Cobb kept his promise—he worked us hard that day.
We practiced coordinated banking, formations, and wingmate guarding exercises. We worked until my fingers felt stiff as gears, my arms ached like I’d been lifting weights, and my brain basically turned to mush. He even worked us through lunch, forcing an aide to bring everyone else sandwiches. I ate rat jerky and mushrooms like always.
The diodes in my helmet cooled down as I worked. The admiral thought she could tell from some readouts if I would be a coward? What kind of insanity was that?
There was no time to worry about it though. Cobb ran us through debris dodging, light-lance turns, and shield reignition drills. It was exhausting in a good way, and the only time I thought of Bim was when I realized that nobody was complaining that—yet again—we weren’t being allowed to use our weapons.
When Cobb at long last let us go, I felt as if I could have curled up right there and dozed off.
“Hey, Arturo,” Nedd said as he stood and stretched, “these projectors are pretty good. You think they could simulate a world where you’re not a scudding terrible pilot?”
“All we need for that,” Arturo said, “is an Off button for your radio. I’m certain we’d all improve by huge leaps if we didn’t have to listen to your incessant jabbering. Besides, as I recall, you were the one who ran into me earlier.”
“You were in my way!”
“Boys, boys,” Hurl said, sauntering past. “Can’t we make peace? Find common ground and agree that you’re both terrible pilots?”
“Ha!” Arturo said. “You just watch—I’ll make you eat those words someday, Hurl.”
“I’m hungry enough that I’d eat them now,” she said, “if they had a decent sauce on them. The mess hall better not be closed. Quirk, can I have your dessert?”
“What?” the girl said, looking up from her harness—which she’d been clipping together and folding neatly in her seat, like she always did when getting out of her mockpit.
“You’re nice and stuff,” Hurl said. “I figure you’ll give in if I push hard enough. So, can I eat your dessert?”
“Bless your stars,” Kimmalyn said. “But touch my pie, and I’ll rip your fingers off.” She blushed when she said it, and lifted her hand in front of her mouth.
“She’ll do it, Hurl,” I joked. “It’s always the nice ones you have to worry about.”
“Yeah,” Hurl said. “Ain’t that the . . .” She trailed off as she realized I was the one who’d spoken. Then she turned and continued out the door.
I knew that look in her eyes. Ever since Jorgen outed me as Chaser’s daughter, things hadn’t been the same between Hurl and me.
The others piled out of the chamber. I sighed, gathering my pack, preparing for an exhausted hike back to my cavern. As I hefted it over my shoulder, I realized that FM hadn’t left. She was standing by the wall, watching me. She was so tall and beautiful. As cadets, we kept DDF pilot dress standards. For daily work, we could choose jumpsuits or standard DDF uniforms if we wanted. We just had to be ready to change into flight suits if a call came up.
Most of us simply wore the jumpsuits, which were the most comfortable. Not FM. Alongside her polished boots, she often wore a tailored uniform with a jacket that somehow looked more stylish on her than others. She was so perfect, she almost seemed more like a statue than a person.
“Thank you,” she said to me, “for what you said earlier. About Bim, Morningtide, and the stars.”
“You didn’t find