of any jobs going.”
That is a good idea. I scratch my cheek. “I might come along.”
“You said your job search hadn’t come up with anything yet,” Jamie counters.
“I’m not officially looking.”
“This will be over once Ward finishes his book.”
“I know.”
“So, is that a definite ‘yes’ for Raleigh’s get together?”
I sigh heavily. “I guess so.”
He shakes his head and looks at me with a grin. “I never had to work so hard to get you out of the door before. What’s Ward got that’s keeping you here?”
I shift uneasily, and try not to fidget, but before I can think of something to say—which would have probably been something silly because I’m so paranoid about Jamie knowing—he says, “Ward’s getting ambitious. He’s outgrown the routines I’ve created for him, so now we’re boxing.”
“Boxing?” That surprises me.
“I let him throw some punches while I held up the shields.”
“You do look slightly red,” I remark, taking a closer look at Jamie’s face.
“It was his idea. He’s turned it all around pretty quickly.”
“Yeah?” He has turned it all around. Last night I found out. His body was hard. His thighs were solid, and his arms were built. He no longer has that belly. I blink and try to force myself to look at Jamie instead of getting pulled back into a replay of me and Ward in his study.
“He’s in a good mood,” Jamie comments. “Is he close to getting his book finished?”
“Must be.”
Jamie sniffs under his armpits. “I need to shower and get to work. Come on Saturday.”
“I’ll let you know.”
“Let me know? You mean I haven’t convinced you?”
“I’m thinking about it.”
When it comes to Ward and me, anything could happen between now and then. Anything.
Chapter 27
WARD
I’m harder. Toned and leaner, and I’m making progress. Sparring with Jamie I can see just how far I’ve come. I myself can see the changes in my body when I feel my arms, and run my hand along my stomach. The flabbiness has gone and in its place are the dips and valleys of muscles which are defined.
Mari likes it. I know she does. She wants me, I can read her so easily. When there’s an end goal, a motivation, it’s always easier to do the hard work.
I shower up after my session and look forward to having my lunch. Having it in the kitchen marks a new change and it gets me out of being in the study all day long. I’ve also figured out my ending. It came to me during that boxing bout with Jamie. I now know exactly what to write and how to wrap my story up, and once I’m in the flow and writing, I’ll get it done in the next few days.
I want to talk to Mari. Maybe talk is going too far. I’m curious to gauge her mood. See if she feels different, because I do. It’s either my story, or her. That’s all I have in my head these days. Now that I’ve fixed the problem with my story, my mind wanders over to Mari and stays there. Hard to forget what happened between us. Harder still to not want more.
But as I head towards the kitchen to have my lunch, I hear Jamie’s voice. He’s still here. They’re laughing. I catch the tail end of their conversation; something about a party. As I walk in, there’s an awkwardness that wasn’t there earlier. My paranoia kicks in. They’ve been talking about me. That son of a bitch has been laughing at me behind my back. Mari doesn’t look my way. Maybe she’s been laughing too.
“Is this mine?” I ask, pulling a plate out of the fridge, even though I never ask her. It’s a given.
“Yes, that’s yours. Did you want—”
“Thanks.” I cut her short, take my food and leave.
Screw that lunchtime conversation with her.
I eat my lunch alone in my study, feeling none of the exuberance I felt before. Highs and lows. That’s the problem with getting involved. I force myself to look over my final few chapters, but every so often I am reminded of Mari and Jamie in the kitchen and it guts me.
I make an attempt to write the ending down, but it’s not that simple now. The words don’t flow out. They are stalled, and stilted. I pour over every word, every character motivation. Every line of dialog. I doubt myself and second guess each line. I’m back to being stuck again.
I put a huge line through the page, then crumble it up and