the cold. It’s barely February and the daylight has already expired for today.
Maybe the quiet awkwardness is because neither of us wants to acknowledge how close we got to doing it the other day.
Or this morning, for that matter.
“Have you heard of the band the Red Lemons? It’s the band Finn can’t stop talking about,” I finally say to break the silence.
“Of course. I think Charlotte was listening to them the other day. Why?”
A spur of the moment idea hits me. “They’re in town this weekend, performing at the Orpheum. Do you want to go to the show with me?”
“Seriously? I’d love to. We have a track meet Friday night but we’re off Saturday, so that’s perfect.”
“Saturday it is.”
“It’s a date,” Maya says, and we high five with our gloves on.
“So…last Saturday was fun,” I add. “As was this morning.”
“It was. Until we were rudely interrupted. What have you been doing the last couple of days?”
“I haven’t been avoiding you, I just had this paper due Monday I had to work on.”
She grins. “You sure you weren’t updating that red notebook?”
I laugh. “No, no updates.” Yet.
“Right. Because what we did was sex, not love. Well, it was closer to sex. I mean…sexual.” She frowns. “I’m talking myself into a corner again, aren’t I?”
“Let’s not back ourselves into any corners just yet. I think it’s going to be hard to define what this is.”
“It’s going to be hard to do it in the suite, even if we want to,” Maya adds.
“Yeah, everyone’s always around,” I reply.
“We could pull an Alex and DJ and sexile our roommates?” she comments, but as soon as she does, she shakes her head. “Nah. That’s just not our style.”
“Why don’t we just chill for a few days. You’ve got that meet Friday night, I’ve got papers to write, and Saturday can be our big day.” I waggle my eyebrows.
“Big day as in…?” She glances at me.
He puts his hand on the small of my back as we near the door to our suite.
Right at that moment, Donnie exits, and sees me touching Maya.
“Hey, you two,” Donnie says, giving me a second glance. “Why are you touching her like that? Wait a minute, you two are more than friends, aren’t you? Because I’ve suspected it for a while.”
Maya pinches her eyebrows and laughs loudly. Take it from Donnie to state the exact thing that’s on his mind. “No, of course not! Grant and me? That’s crazy.” Wow—she’s really reveling in denying it.
Clearly, she wants to keep us on the down low—and I’m fine with that, too. Not that it would be the end of the world if everyone knew what we were up to. But with how bad gossip can get, I’d like to respect her wish for privacy.
So, I laugh, too. “Yeah, me and Maya? That’s totally ridiculous.”
“Whatever. I’ve always thought you two would make a great couple.” Donnie shrugs. “Oh, well. Guess I was wrong.” Donnie walks away toward the dining hall.
“That’s crazy, we’d never make a great couple,” Maya says, although her tone isn’t super-convincing.
“No. No way. We’re just good at kissing each other and we like hanging out a lot. That’s totally different.”
“Totally different,” she says, but as I hold the door open for her, I can’t help but think that statement sounds slightly crazy.
Maybe we’re both a little nuts.
I definitely know she’s bringing out a side of me that’s long been dormant. I can’t wait for Saturday already.
17
Maya
On Saturday, I get ready in the bathroom while Grant leans against the counter, keeping me company.
We keep the door open purposefully, to prove to our suite mates there is no funny business going on. Suite mates doing things like makeup while someone else is showering in the bathroom is a normal way of life, so we don’t think they’ll suspect anything, as long as there are no slaps and moans coming from in here.
“So, I’ve decided I really want to do the internal journey we talked about,” I say as I put my makeup on in the bathroom. “I need to clarify some things about my major and my future that have been on my mind. Do you really think magic mushrooms will clarify my thinking?”
Grant leans in the doorframe. “Yes, it absolutely will. If you’re ready to become who you want to be.”
Walking up behind me, he puts his hand on my bare stomach.
“Okay, Yoda. But how do you know it will help me?”
“We hold trauma in the body. I do. You do.