together, me fucking into his mouth and him smiling around my cock and taking it.
I threaded my fingers through his hair and pulled and savored, and Jesus, my sexual world was blown open in that moment. It wasn’t just physical, but this need I felt deep in my gut, living in my bones.
Josh started to jack himself, and that just fueled me. He was stroking, and I was fucking his face in this way I’d never done with another soul in my life. It was like he’d set something free inside me.
My balls started to draw tight, my orgasm going from this distant urge to an immediate need. “I’m gonna… Should I pull out?”
Josh shook his head, so I didn’t, just kept going until my vision blurred and my balls let loose, my load spurting deep into his mouth in pulse after pulse. Josh swallowed each one down, making me cry out and shoot again.
When my dick slipped out of his mouth, Josh dropped his head back against the wall. He stared up, eyes firmly on me as he sped up the strokes on his shaft, then tensed as the first spurt shot out, landing on his T-shirt, followed by another and another, his load dripping down his hand.
Then…then he looked up at me, and I looked down at him…and it was clear our lust was suddenly taking a back seat to our common sense as we took each other in like, What now?
“I…”
“I wanted that,” I interrupted him. “Please don’t tell me it was a mistake.” My logical mind knew it was, but I couldn’t hear it. I’d just enjoyed sex in a completely new way. The last thing I wanted to hear was that it had been an error in judgment.
“I wanted it too,” Josh admitted, then leaned in, licking the left-behind come from my shaft. He pulled up my underwear, tucking me into them, followed by my pants.
“I’ll get you a towel.” I walked away, realization hitting me. I’d just gotten blown by Josh Westbrook in the middle of my damn bar.
I tossed him a clean cloth, and he wiped himself off before standing up and pulling up his underwear and jeans. I threw the towel in the trash, and we were quiet again, the air around us thick and uncomfortable.
“I, um, really didn’t touch anyone else all week. I’ve been thinking about you.”
His words were like a hit to the chest, stealing my breath.
“But I still can’t… If we do this again, it can’t be more than sex for me. Even trying scares the shit out of me. I’ve never been afraid of sex, but I am with you… Still, I want you. Damned if I don’t want you, Griff, and I don’t want to walk away from that. It makes me feel selfish as fuck, because you’re… You don’t do this, and you’re Kellan’s brother, and my friend. Fuck, you’re my friend, and I don’t want to hurt you.” His voice broke, the truth and pain clear in the crackle of his words.
It felt like a repeat of the same conversation we had at the cabin—the basics of it at least. Nothing had changed, yet everything had.
“You’re my friend too. If you’re selfish, I am as well because I know this is…worrying for you, because of what you told me and our friendship, but I don’t want to stop. I want you too. God, I want sex. What we just did? I’ve never experienced sex like that before. It’s hard to even put into words, but it wasn’t like going through the motions; it was this intense desire like nothing I’ve ever known. I’m not ready to let that go, but hell, Josh. I’m not asking for anything more than you can give. You have sex with people all the time. Why am I different?”
“Because you’re you,” Josh said simply, as if that explained everything, which raised my hackles.
“Please don’t use what I told you against me like that.”
“I’m not. I didn’t mean it that way, but that’s a concern too. Do you know what Kellan said to me today? Don’t hurt my brother. We were working out, and Callum and Nat said something that made him think something had gone down between us, and he told me not to hurt you, that he couldn’t live with it if I did.”
I rolled my eyes. “I don’t need Kellan to take care of me.”
“Kellan never needed you to take care of him, but that didn’t stop