she’s all THAT.
“Maddy, are you still there?”
“Yeah, I am.” I grind my teeth to keep from saying, “Tatiana is a snarky bitch! Why can’t you see that?”
“So...” he trails off.
“So...” I echo. “Um, is that the extent of your relationship with Tatiana?” As much as I try to keep my voice steady, it falters.
I know that it’s best to get it all out in the open, but a part of me is afraid to hear his answer. My stomach is in knots.
“What are you talking about?” He sounds a bit affronted.
There is a taut silence. My nails dig sharply into my palms.
Eventually, he says in a low and deliberate voice, “No, I am not dating her, if that’s what you mean.”
I cover the receiver so he can’t hear me whooping, “WOOT! WOOT! Mika is not dating that Orange Slut with Split Ends!”
“Madison,” he breathes my name, “are you jealous of her? Because there’s really noth—”
“NO!” I interject forcefully. “No,” I repeat softly. “Of course not. I mean…we’re just friends, right?”
“Yeah,” he says simply. “Friends.”
Flopping back onto my pillow, I close my eyes in exasperation. “Of course...” I bite my inner lip, disappointment striking me like a blow in the stomach.
“So, are we okay now?” he asks softly.
A hint of a smile touches my lips. “We’re okay.”
“Maddy, I’ll stop giving her a ride to work if it bothers you.”
“Pssh! Why would it bother me? She’s a sweetheart, right?” I almost gag in the process. “So give her a ride. I don’t care.”
But inside, I do care. I’m afraid she’ll cast him under some voodoo spell of hers.
After a hesitant pause, he asks, “You sure?”
“Positive,” I say and clear my throat. “So, um what else do you think of Tatiana?” I ask in an innocent voice. “I mean, I know you think she’s a sweetheart and all that, but do you think she’s pretty too?”
“I don’t think about her. Period,” he says with such force and conviction it takes me by surprise.
Good answer. It is the answer I’ve been longing to hear. So I brush Tatiana off as just a minor hiccup in our fledging friendship.
We talk for hours, exchanging tidbits of this and that, covering every moment of our brief time apart. Burning up the minutes on our cell phones, we tacitly avoid any mention of Tatiana.
Unbeknownst to me, when I bragged on my resume that I was an excellent multitasker, I would actually turn out to become one; wonders never cease! Working in this call center has turned me into a multitasking queen. Here’s an example:
Beep!
“Thanks for calling Lightning Speed Communications. This is Maddy. How can I help you?” I ask, while reading chapter eight of The Da Vinci Code. MUTE.
Then I listen to the caller, read a paragraph and crunch on a Hershey’s bar. After taking a moment to chew and swallow, I release the MUTE key. “I’ll be happy to assist with that,” I say briskly.
And if I get a caller who just wants to bitch, moan and listen to himself talk forever and a day, just like this caller that I have on the line right now, well all the better!
I jab the MUTE button, tune him out and read several more paragraphs. This part is juicy! Langdon has solved another enigmatic riddle and the Priory of Sion are on to him.
In the past few months, I’ve read the entire Shopaholic series, The Hunger Games trilogy, Khaled Hosseini’s novels, Paullina Simon’s The Bronze Horseman and all its sequels, Nicholas Sparks’ tear-jerkers, Jodi Picoult’s controversial books, and now Dan Brown’s mind gripping thrillers.
The problem is, Dan Brown has got me gung-ho on conspiracy theories—the secret brotherhood of the Illuminati, the fraternal order of the Freemasons. So riveting and such fascinating stuff.
And truth be told, I think there’s a conspiracy going on in this call center. Last week, this company spent millions of moolahs buying up air time space on TV and radio to launch their new ad campaign. Their new slogan: Lightning Speed Communications, We Service All Your Needs in Lightning Time.
Groan. I know. It is so stooooopid!
I brushed off that silly ad campaign, but I really should have paid more attention. It was the purveyor of bad things to come.
Today, everyone on the floor received this apocalyptic email:
From: Corporate Headquarters
To: All Customer Service/ Tech Support Agents.
Subject: Our new ad campaign.
We have proudly launched our new ad campaign—We Service All Your Needs in Lightning Time. In order for our campaign to be a success, we will focus on