pride won’t let you just call him up and ask to be together again.”
“You don’t know that.” I mumble the lie. She’s right, I totally will not be the one to go crawling back. Plus, I wasn’t the one with a damn skank attached to my lips.
She gives me a look, but doesn’t respond to my mumbled lie. “We need to make him be the one to come back to you. But we have to go about it in a way that isn’t too blatantly obvious.”
We eat in silence for a few minutes. Both of us coming up with different ways to make this work. I’m not really a hundred percent sure that this is a good idea but Kealy is right. I will always wonder what could’ve been if I was such a chicken shit. But even at the thought of getting back together my heart and mind are warring. My heart is jumping up and down with glee, while my head is banging against my skull to knock some sense into me.
I pour more wine into both of our glasses and take a nice big sip to drown out how much my brain is telling me that this is an awful idea. Drunk me will let my heart take the lead.
“I guess we could start working out there.” Kea proposes suddenly making me choke on my wine.
I cough a few times before responding. “Won’t that look a little obvious? I’ve avoided that place at all costs for months now. It’ll look a little weird if I just start going there again.”
“Not if you groan about how your friend dragged you there because she wants to be taught self-defense.” She gives me a sad little smile that breaks my heart. “With my history, no one would bat an eye about you being a good friend and helping me with this.”
I put my glass down and grab onto her hands. “Babe, there are only a few of us who know about what happened to you. What are you going to tell people the reason for why you want to learn self-defense?”
“The truth.” She says simply. “I’m a terrible liar so it would be pointless to even try.”
“I can’t let you do that Kea. That gym is swarming with huge men, most of whom are fighters in their prime.”
“All the more reason for me to go to them to learn some defensive moves.” The stubborn ass states. I go to say something but she stops me. “Listen, I’ve been meaning to get around to taking a few self-defense courses anyway. I just haven’t been able to work up the courage to ask anyone to teach me. I’ve heard that Danny is really good and does teach that in his gym.”
I give her a genuine smile. “He’s great at it. He always says that he wants to make sure that a woman has the ability to protect herself at all times.”
“See.” She gives me a smug smile. “And it wouldn’t even look weird if I dragged you along, since it’s obvious that I tend to shy away from men.”
“It’s not that obvious.” I lie through my teeth. She couldn’t look anymore skittish if she tried when she’s near men, not that I blame her, but still.
She rolls her eyes. “Listen, I know that it is. I’ve tried to work hard on that for awhile now, but I know that I always look scared whenever a man gets too close to me. It’s something that I’m still working on. Which would make all the more sense that I would have you with me as a bit of a shield.” She gives me a weary look. “And let’s face it, I probably will be using you as a shield the first couple of hundred times that I go there. Once they see my normal reaction, any thoughts of you trying to be there to see Danny will fly right out the window.”
“Are you sure about this Kea? We can totally find a different way to go about this. I don’t want you to put any stress on yourself honey. We all heal in our own time. I don’t want you to push something that you’re not ready for.”
“Like I said,” she drawls, while giving me an annoyed look. “I’ve been meaning to start taking these classes. I feel like they’ll probably do wonders for my sense of security. This is something that I need to do. And if we happen to get your man