After all, this would be his first Christmas without her.
I ended up agreeing to go with Parker to meet his family before heading home for the holidays. He was picking me up at one, and I knew I should get up and pack. I stayed in bed longer, wanting to ease the anxiety that was starting to fill my chest. Meeting parents was a big deal. What if they didn’t like me? What if I didn’t like them? I brushed the thought aside. There was no way Parker’s parents could be anything but wonderful. He turned out way too good.
I threw off my covers, knowing full well I had to at least get a short run in today or I would be a total mess. I got dressed and stepped out of my room, quietly shutting the door, so I wouldn’t wake Issy or Jake, who had only just gotten home a few hours ago. To my surprise, the couch was empty, and Jake was moving around in the kitchen.
As always, my body had a physical reaction to seeing him, and I hated it. He wasn’t wearing a shirt and his jeans were slightly open at the top. His hair was going in every direction, and I smiled, knowing I preferred it to the perfect styling he usually had. He looked up, catching me staring at him and grinned.
“I thought you’d be getting up soon,” he said in a cheery voice.
I walked tentatively toward the kitchen to make my energy drink for the run and was taken aback when Jake slid it to me at the bar. I looked up at him questionably.
“You drink those before you run, right?” He asked as he started to wipe down the counter. “I’ve been watching you in the mornings, and it seems to be your ritual.”
I wasn’t sure what to say and stood there staring at him in disbelief.
“How many miles are you running today?” he asked while he continued to work.
“I don’t know, I haven’t decided yet,” I whispered, unable to find any volume in my voice.
He leaned over the counter to look at me, resting casually on his elbows. “Why do you always look so surprised when I do nice things for you?”
“I don’t know,” I answered, finally getting my vocal cords to work. “I guess we never really got to this part.” I knew Jake was aware of how uncomfortable he made me. He seemed to relish it, like my uneasiness around him gave him confidence. He came around the bar and stood so close to me that I could feel the heat radiating off his chest.
“I meant what I said the other night,” he said quietly, the sparks between us so extreme that I literally felt frozen in his presence.
“I’m leaving today,” I finally said as I took a step backwards, looking for any excuse to put some distance between us. “And I probably won’t see you until after Christmas.” I walked back in my room, grabbed the perfectly wrapped present, and handed it to him. “So here. Merry Christmas.” I was trying to be as nonchalant as I could, but my heart was slamming against my ribcage to the point where it almost hurt.
He seemed startled by the gesture and began opening it, taking care not to tear any of the paper. He turned the frame over to see the photo and quietly ran his hand over the glass, stopping on the gloved hand in the picture. His eyes said it all when he looked up. They conveyed his pain with such ferocity that I wanted to take him in my arms and tell him everything would be ok. But I didn’t. I just stood there in silence, waiting.
He closed the space between us and hugged me with such sincerity that I had to fight the tears that were starting to invade my eyes.
“Thank you,” he whispered in my ear, burying his face into my hair as he held me. I hugged him back, but with much more reserve, remembering how quickly Jake could muddy my senses with his touch.
He slowly released me, but didn’t step back, instead stared in my eyes, searching as always for some unknown thing. “Spend the day with me. We’ll go do the lines again just like before.”
“Jake, I can’t.”
“Just as friends, I promise. Your parents won’t care if you go home today or tomorrow. Give me this.” His urgency surprised me.
I hesitated and moved away, grabbing my headsets for the run. “It’s