still and letting the world stop around me for a moment. It brings me clarity and focus.”
“Is there something you need clarity on now?” I asked.
He rolled over to his side in response and rested on his elbow. I followed suit and faced him so he would know I was listening.
“Well, there’s this girl I met that I can’t seem to get out of my head.” His voice was playful, but I got the sense he was being serious, and my pulse started to pick up.
“Really?” I teased. “And why can’t you get her out of your head?”
He inched himself closer to me, and looked at me deep in my eyes. His look wasn’t intense or sensual, just appreciative. “You see, she’s spectacular, and even more amazing, she doesn’t know it yet.” He leaned in slowly as he spoke and kissed me. It was soft and careful, and only lasted a few seconds, but I felt my stomach flutter when he pulled back and smiled at me. His eyes were full of care and concern, and I felt goose bumps cover my entire body.
“You’re not so bad yourself,” I whispered, returning his smile. We continued to lay on our backs and Parker’s hand moved over to mine to hold it. Parker was right, there was something very calming about sitting still and even more so about his presence. The comfort level I had with him seemed impossible, and yet here I was, feeling a serenity that surpassed my wildest expectations.
“Lord, I pray your strength be upon her and that you will rescue her when she needs it from the mouth of the lion. I pray she is able to stand firm and put her hope in your unfailing love.”
11. THANKSGIVING
Today was Thursday. I sat up in bed, dread covering me like a blanket and realized that I would have to be especially on guard today. The last few days were like a nice dream. I would run in the morning, work in the lab, and then meet Parker at the library to study. We would talk about our families and what we wanted for the future. I learned that the Air Force was paying for his school, and that they were also sending him to Medical School after graduation. Since Winsor didn’t have an active unit at the school, he would drive to Charlotte once a month and meet with a unit there.
I smiled as I thought about how careful Parker always was with me, whether it was holding my hand or stealing a kiss now and then, he always did so with such consideration. He made me feel precious and valued, like his world revolved around making sure I knew how special I was to him.
The realization hit me that for the first time in months, I didn’t think about throwing up. What I found amazing was not that I was able to resist it, but that I felt a calm that negated the desire to do it at all. I felt healthy. Of course, it had only been four days, but considering I had been alone in the apartment all that time, it was a pretty big feat.
I looked at the clock. It was 9:00 a.m., and I promised Issy I would be at her house before noon. I didn’t want to get up. I just wanted to throw the covers back over my head and sleep the day away. There was nothing to look forward to. Parker had left last night for his parents. Issy was probably going to be very high maintenance, and Jake…well who ever knew with Jake. Would he be my kind, loving, sweet Jake? Or the angry, rude and emotionally unavailable Jake? Part of me didn’t know which one I would prefer. If “my Jake” were there, I would miss him, but I really did hate the other version. It was a no win situation for me. I sighed as my alarm continued to ding at me. Let’s get this over with!
The drive was relatively quiet and really pretty. Issy lived an hour from school down predominately back roads. Trees lined the road as far as the eye could see and almost created a hypnotic setting for the driver.
I pulled off the main highway onto smaller roads and finally into a gated community called Season Oaks. The houses were spectacular, at least twice the size of my house in Georgia. I followed the curvy road in awe of every house I looked at,