and not argue with me. “I know. I want you to know I’ll never bother him, or you, again.”
I say nothing although my fists clench tightly again when she stands up and walks to Zack’s bed and touches his perfect hand. She leans in and I hear her whisper an apology and good-bye. She leaves the room without looking back and I feel an almost audible whoosh of tension follow her out the door.
I sit next to Zack, holding his hand, with my cheek resting on top of it and I cry. I cry because I’m filled with relief that Zack doesn’t want her and because I hate myself for even doubting his faithfulness, or Mia and Chase’s reassurances over the last week. Mostly I cry because I’m still absolutely terrified he won’t wake up like the doctors say and I have no idea what will happen to me if I lose someone I so desperately love again.
***
His hand moved.
It’s the only thought I have when I jolt awake as I feel something tickling the palm of my hand. It’s slight, but enough to wake me up. I almost think it’s a dream until his hand twitches again with a little more pressure. I flick my gaze back and forth from his hand to his eyes; hope swells in my chest.
Eight days. Eight days I’ve waited for a sign that he is beginning to wake up. Joy floods through me while I watch his eyes flicker and open slightly before closing again. I immediately reach over and press the call button for the nurse’s station. Zack is waking up!
I squeeze Zack’s hand, desperate to see a sign of movement again. To my shock, he squeezes my hand back. Tears form in my eyes refusing to be torn away from his in case he opens them again.
I turn and smile just a few minutes later when the nurse comes into the room. “He’s been squeezing my hand, and I saw his eyes flicker open a couple of times. I think he’s waking up.” She smiles briefly but says nothing. Instead she comes over and checks his vitals quietly for a few minutes, checking his pulse and flashing a small flashlight in his eyes.
“I’ll call Dr. Hassen and let him know. If what you said is true, it may still take him a few more hours, or even a day or two to fully wake up.” She places her hand on my shoulder and squeezes. “Don’t give up. This is good news. Just have faith – it should be soon.” She smiles sweetly and leaves the room.
For the next several hours, Melody and Sammy hover over me in Zack’s room. Once the nurse shared the news that I had seen some movements, they rush to his room hoping to see him wake up. My time with him alone is gone, but I don’t care. I don’t mind the extra bodies in the cramped room. I just want to see Zack’s eyes open.
Dr. Hassen comes in several hours later to check in on us. We’re all exhausted, but too tense and anxious to leave. As the doctor checks Zack’s chart, I feel another slight squeeze on my hand and gasp. I look to Dr. Hassen who smiles tentatively at me. We say nothing, but I swear I see him nod his slightly, encouraging me.
Another hand twitch from Zack and a small moan causes Sammy and Melody to flee from the too small loveseat on the back wall and rush to his bedside. All four of us stand by his bed, frozen, waiting to hear more. It feels like hours later, but was probably only a few seconds or minutes when Zack moans again. Except this time, the word he spoke was audible – barely. “Nicole.”
It sends shivers down my spine instantly and tears fill my eyes. I gasp, and am pretty sure I stop breathing. Sammy’s hand comes around my shoulder and squeezes me supportively, but it doesn’t help. We watch Zack as his eye lids flutter, and slowly, he opens them. There is a blankness in them I have never seen before as he looks around the room.
I try to let go of his hand, maybe Melody or Sammy should be holding it. Without turning away from the doctor, he squeezes mine back more forcefully refusing to let go.
“Nod if you can hear me Zack.” He nods and the doctor continues. “You’re in the hospital. You were in a car accident just