play but I get held up and have to haul ass to get down the field where I should be standing when I see Cash’s arm go behind his head. I make it just in time and make the catch scoring a touchdown. The guys pat me on my back when I get off to the sidelines. Glancing at Cash he gives me a nod, congratulating me for making that catch. The Beavers are only able to score a field goal. By the end of the quarter we’re leading.
The fourth quarter we’re off to a bad start. The Beavers are up a field goal and a touchdown. Cash is able to find me and we score leaving the score twenty-four to thirty. We’re in the lead. It’s one tough ass game as we all expected it would be. With less than two minutes on the clock the Beavers score again. The game is tied. The clock is winding down. Plays are being yelled without a huddle. Cash gets us as close to the end zone with handing the ball off but we’re out of time; he has to throw the ball. He looks to me and I know that look. He’s relying on me to score, to win this game for us. I nod and he makes the call for the play. Saylor hikes the ball to Cash, he makes the snap and I’m right where I should be but the throw is off and I make the split second turn and catch the ball for a twelve-yard touchdown.
We win thirty-six to thirty-five.
The fans and team rush the field. Colton runs to me and I jump mid-air and he catches me. Saylor slaps my ass as the rest of the guy’s congratulate me. I’ve played one of my best games. I don’t feel like I should be living in the victory because I know when I get back to that locker room and take the piss test my season is over. This was the least that I could do for them. I give myself a few minutes to live in the moment because it’s about to be all over.
After the interviews I head back to the locker room. Cash is already there standing at his locker. I glance over to him. “Good game. Best throw you made all year.”
He doesn’t respond. I didn’t really expect him to.
“Hayes? You’re up.” A rep from the NCAA says looking at me.
They test all of us after the last game and after a bowl game too. I knew that heading into the game but last night I didn’t care. I needed that escape.
“I’m sure Steven would have loved to see this shit,” Cash mumbles.
I glare at him. “Don’t you fucking say his name around me.”
“Why? Does it hurt to know you were responsible?”
“Fuck you, Cash.” I brush past him on the way to the bathroom.
“Landon Hayes?” The man holding a clipboard asks.
I nod but don’t say anything. He hands me a piece of paper that says I’m being tested with my name and date. I sign it, hand it back.
He follows me back to the bathrooms, makes me wash my hands with water only and then tells me to drop my pants down to my ankles.
“Lift your shirt up to your arm pits.”
There’s no modesty allowed here. They see it all.
“Now turn around and do a three-sixty.”
I do as he says. This isn’t my first drug test so I know what the drill is here. He watches me piss in the cup and then takes it and calls the next player back.
I know I’m not passing. I smoked pot yesterday.
Coach sees me walk out and he knows too. I feel the disappointment rolling from him.
When I come back into the locker room with the guys, Colton and Cash are shoving each other. I know where this is going so I stand in between them but I can’t help myself and start laughing. Probably because I should be laughing at myself right now.
Or that I just find it funny that Cash just punched Colton.
“It’s not even about you just being an all-around dick anymore,” Cash says to me knocking my hands away. “It’s about you having a fucking drug problem.” And then he shoves me backwards into Coach Lander. “You not only let me down, you let Steven down. You let the whole fucking team down, you piece of shit!”
I don’t say anything because he’s absolutely right.
And then I’m fucking pissed. I’m pissed because I’m