being held at Zach’s house. I didn’t want to go but she said that she’d tell Landon that she found me in bed naked with Cash. I know she would never tell him but she still threatened me with it.
It’s early in the night still and the guys haven’t arrived yet. Heather and I find a seat in the kitchen and we’re making fun of the drunks dancing.
“Look at that guy,” Heather laughs. “He thinks he has moves.”
I snort almost spitting my beer out when I glance over to where she’s looking. This guy is dancing like he’s got a stick up his ass. “I’d hate to see what he’s like in bed.”
Heather grimaces.
“Actually, I bet he’s a stud in bed,” I tease.
Heather turns and cocks an eyebrow at me. “You’re fucking kidding, right?”
I shake my head and bring my beer up to my lips to hide my smile. She looks back and forth between us and I can’t contain my laughter anymore.
I wipe the tears from my eyes and notice Jay walking toward me. What the hell is he doing here? I look past him to see if Madison is trailing behind. She’s not, thank God.
Jay is scary. I’m not sure why Madison hangs around him but the dude is not attractive, if you ask me. He’s clearly done too many drugs and if I had to guess, he has ink poisoning from the amount of tattoos he is covered in.
He walks up to me, never making eye contact, and bumps my shoulder. “Here’s your stuff.” He hands me something then he walks away without another thought.
Heather’s eyebrows draw in confusion. “Do you know him?”
I shake my head and glance down to my hand. In a little baggy are a red pill and two small white ones.
“What the hell is that?” Heather asks.
“I have no idea.” I look around to see if anyone is looking at us. “I guess he thought I was Madison.” I offer. It’s the only thing that makes sense.
“What are you going to do with them?”
I think about that for a minute. What am I going to do? I knew Madison was popping pills for a while. I’ve seen her do it. And it’s the only time that she doesn’t seem to have a care in the world. I wonder what that would feel like. To not care about the next homework assignment. To not care about what Landon is doing or who he’s doing. To not feel anything. To be numb to the world.
“I’m taking them,” I state matter-of-factly.
Heather shakes her head. “No, you’re not. I won’t let you.”
I look away when I say, “I want to feel what she feels. Even if it’s only for one night. I just want to shut my mind off.”
“I’m going to the bathroom.” She pins me with a look. “Do. Not. Take. Them. Without. Me.”
I salute her.
The second Heather walks away I toss all three pills in my mouth and wash them down with my beer.
The guys from the football team arrive. Colton, Jet, Declan, Holden, and even Sean swarm around me. The music seems to be turned up louder. The guys all crowd my space and they’re causing me to feel like I’m knocking on the doors to hell with how hot it is in here.
Heather comes back from the bathroom and Declan gets a goofy smile on his face when he sees her.
He kisses her cheek and then she scoots her way over to me. “You sure you want to do this?”
I nod and the room tilts a little.
She shakes her head in disbelief. “Alright. Where are they?”
I smile. Warmth comes over my body. It’s getting hotter in here by the minute.
“You took them, didn’t you?”
I nod.
“Fuck, Macy,” Heather says.
I’m burning up now. I can literally feel the warmth in my cheeks rising. It’s actually… nice. I kind of like this feeling. No wonder people take drugs.
Jesus. It’s like a rollercoaster ride but you never quite fall.
“I wanna dance!” I try hopping off the chair and almost fall but Heather reaches out to steady me. “With him,” I say, pointing at Holden.
“That’s not such a good idea,” Heather says looking at Holden.
He winks at me. Oh, yeah. It’s a good idea.
“It’s a perfect idea. Loosen up, Heather,” I say tapping her cheek gently with my hand. “Go fuck Declan all you want.”
Heather’s jaw hits the floor. “This is going to be a long fucking night,” she mumbles as I walk away.
Holden’s smiles grows a little.