my paycheck, so I haven’t asked, but is everything okay? Gus is always so quiet. I can’t work out what his deal is.”
“It’s complicated.”
“What a marvellously helpful answer! So glad I asked.” Daisy rolled her eyes.
“Look, I can’t—it’s not quite—my secret to share.” I winced. Even saying the word ‘secret’ was more than I’d wanted to let slip. Of course, Daisy pounced on it.
“Is he in some kind of trouble? Because Holden, listen. I know you’ve got a big heart, and you’re probably trying to help, but if he’s in some kind of legal trouble, then I’m not sure him staying here is the best idea.”
I wanted to object that I didn’t have a big heart, and the fact that Gus had gotten under my skin so much was weird, frankly, but there were more important things to tackle.
“He’s not in trouble, per se. At least, I didn’t think so. But now that he’s disappeared, I’m starting to worry.”
Daisy’s eyebrows drew down in thought. “He didn’t tell you he was going anywhere?”
I shook my head. “Where would he even go?”
“Fair point.” Daisy glanced out one of the kitchen windows. “It’s really coming down out there now. I wouldn’t even want to try to make it to Birch Bay in this, much less anywhere farther.”
The worry gnawing at my gut was rapidly blossoming into full-blown fear.
“You don’t think he would leave, do you?” I chewed the inside of my cheek. “I mean, not in this weather.”
“I don’t think anyone with any sense would try to leave in this. But I can’t tell you if that statement applies to Gus or not.”
Fuck. Another valid point. Would Gus have enough sense—or just familiarity with snow—to know you didn’t go outside in white-out conditions? What if he’d never experienced a blizzard before? He was sure excited by the prospect of snow last night.
“I’m sure he’s just holed up with a book somewhere,” Daisy said. “Unless he said something to make you think otherwise.”
I replayed my conversation with Gus in my mind and tried to recall his exact words. He didn’t say he was leaving. But I’d definitely made it sound like I didn’t want him here. And Gus….
“See you later, Holden.”
Not the most ominous sentence in the world, on its own. But there had been something final about the way he’d said it.
“Fuck.” I looked at Daisy in horror. “Fuck, I have to go find him.”
I turned and left the kitchen. By the time I was halfway down the hall, I was running, Daisy dogging my footsteps.
“Holden! What do you think you’re doing? Where are you going?” Daisy called behind me, but I didn’t stop until I reached the foyer, pressing on a panel of the wall behind the suit of armor to reveal the coat closet that the builders had cunningly concealed.
“If he went out in the storm, then God knows where he is by now,” I said as I grabbed a pair of heavy snow boots and tugged them on. “I need to go look for him.”
“But you don’t know that he did go out,” Daisy pointed out. “And if it’s not safe for him to be outside, it’s not safe for you, either.”
“It’s not safe for him,” I said as I pulled on a parka, “because he has no idea where he is, or what the estate looks like, or maybe even where he’s going. Plus, he doesn’t have a cell phone.”
For once, I was grateful I’d grabbed mine earlier that day, intending to text Hadley. I hadn’t actually done that, but at least I had the phone in my pocket now.
“And how are you even going to find him in all of this?” Daisy asked. “How are you going to make sure you don’t fall and break something, or freeze to death?”
“Because I know the land,” I said, with more confidence than I felt. But it was true that I did know the estate well. After seven years, and childhood visits, I’d probably run every inch of it by now. “And because I’m not going to stay out for too long.”
I pulled on a fleece-lined hat, wrapped a scarf around my neck, and zipped my jacket up before pulling on thick gloves.
“At least wait long enough for me to get my stuff,” Daisy said. “I’ll come with you. We can cover more ground that way.”
“No, I need you to stay here in case he comes back.” I crossed to the front door.
“So you stay and let me go. Holden, this