this is appropriate, but I can’t have a conversation about it now. What do parents do in this situation? Her parents, I assume, are all right with it, but then she’s older than Lucas.
‘I’ll say goodnight, then.’
Matt holds up a hand. ‘Night, mate.’
‘Night, night, Lucas.’
He ducks back into his room and I sigh as he shuts the door.
‘He’s growing up too fast,’ I say to Matt. ‘Do all parents want to keep their offspring as children?’
‘That’s beyond my paygrade,’ Matt admits. ‘As I said, the joys of parenting have, so far, eluded me. I’d love kids though. Maybe one day.’
‘I’m finding it tough.’ I need Shelby’s input and he’s rarely here to give it.
‘Do you think you and Shelby will have your own children?’
‘No.’ It sounds sadder than I expected. ‘Shelby doesn’t want any more. I guess it’s a big gap to think about starting again when your son is almost a man.’
Even though Lucas can be a pain in the backside some days, I feel my life is so much richer for having him in it, and it’s only now that I’ve begun to think that I would have liked children of my own too. Previously, it was something that had never been on the cards. As you know, my relationships with the opposite sex have been few and far between. None of them struck me as potential father material. Yet, now that I have finally found someone to love, Shelby has made it very clear that he’s done his bit and that becoming a daddy again isn’t on the cards for him in the future. And I get that. So it looks like Lucas will be my one and only chance to satisfy my maternal instincts.
While I’m waiting for the kettle to boil, I slide a few slices of bread in the toaster too. I need a bit of comfort food to set me right and it seems like a lifetime ago since I ate dinner. I pile on lots of butter and heap it on a plate on the table between us. Matt and I pick at it.
‘I’ll take the rest of the week off,’ Matt says. ‘I need to call the office in the morning, but they’ll understand.’
‘You said you had lots of commitments,’ I remind him.
‘I do, but nothing that can’t wait. This is important.’
‘I can manage.’
He smiles at me and it brings me close to tears. I’ve been strong for Bev, but now I want to cry. ‘I’m sure you can, but I can also help. If you’ll let me.’
‘I don’t like to abuse your kindness.’
‘I offered,’ he says. ‘You’ve simply got to say yes.’
‘If you can, that would really take the pressure off me.’
‘No problem. I’ve still got a week of leave I was going to write off, so now I’ll take it. I’ll make a few calls in the morning, then I’ll be here as soon as I can.’
‘I can’t thank you enough.’
‘Hopefully, Alan will be back on his feet soon. Until then, I’m sure I can help you here.’
We finish our tea and toast, then Matt takes his leave. He stands at his car door while I open the gate for him. He kisses my cheek. ‘Tomorrow is another day,’ he says. ‘It will all be OK.’
And he is such a calming influence that I fully believe him.
Chapter Forty-Five
Aurora is at the stove frying mushrooms when I get back from feeding the animals. She’s wearing her pants, quite small ones, and a T-shirt, also quite small. I have no idea where to look.
‘Morning,’ she says, quite unfazed at being found nearly naked in my kitchen.
‘Morning,’ I say and widen my eyes in disapproval at Lucas who is also just in his pants and T-shirt – though they do cover a bit more.
He is oblivious to my secret eye signals – or pretends he is – and says, ‘Morning.’
‘Do you want some mushrooms, Molly?’ Aurora asks, pleasantly. ‘There’s plenty.’
‘No, thanks. I had breakfast before I went out. I’ve just come back for some gloves.’ I also wanted a word with Lucas about Aurora staying over, but that will clearly have to wait.
‘Have you heard from Bev?’ Lucas asks.
‘Yes. Alan’s OK. Thank goodness. He’s still in hospital for today and she’s going in to see him later. The mayor is coming here to help us while Bev has a few days off.’
‘Cool. I’ll have brekky and I’ll be with you.’ Aurora in her underwear comes to sit next to him. She twines her