him through the exhibition, growing in confidence as she shared her knowledge of the books and artwork.
‘Sounds like you had a fun time putting it all together,’ said Charlie.
‘I did,’ agreed Deira. ‘I’m very lucky to have had the opportunity to bring this amazing collection to the public.’
At last Charlie told her that he thought they had enough material, and thanked her for being so helpful.
He looked at Jonah, who gave him a thumbs-up and checked his recording. Jonah then said he had another job to get to so he’d see Charlie later.
‘Did you get everything you want?’ asked Deira.
‘Yes, thanks.’
She stood awkwardly beside him, unsure of what, if anything, she should say. He ignored her as he looked at various pieces of the video.
‘I’m sorry.’ She blurted it out and he paused the playback to look at her. ‘About that night. I’m so, so sorry. It’s been eating me up ever since.’
‘Don’t worry about it.’
‘But I do,’ she said. ‘I realise that this opportunity for me to say something is as random as it may be unwelcome, but I’m not . . . I’m not really the sort of person I appeared to be. I—’
‘You made a mistake. It’s fine.’
‘It’s not.’ She shook her head. ‘You were absolutely right. I objectified you. I made it all about your body and what you could give me and not about you as a person. And you’re a decent person, I know that. I tried to take advantage of you. I honestly can’t apologise enough.’
His eyes met hers and held them for a moment.
‘Apology accepted,’ he said.
‘I feel I have to justify myself, even though there’s no justification.’
‘Not to me you don’t.’
‘Mr Mulholland. Charlie. Please. I know I’m only trying to make myself feel better, but . . . could we have coffee or something?’
‘Now?’ he asked.
‘Yes, if you like.’
‘OK.’
She was surprised at his unequivocal acceptance. ‘There’s a good place around the corner,’ she said. ‘Can you give me five minutes? I need to get my bag.’
‘OK,’ he said again.
She took the lift to her office, grabbed her bag and was back in the lobby a couple of minutes later. Charlie had already packed away his gear and was waiting for her.
‘This way.’ She led him out of the building.
The coffee shop was almost empty, with only a few people sitting in booths, laptops open in front of them. Deira went to get the coffees, telling Charlie to pick a seat.
‘How are your ribs, by the way?’ he asked when she put an Americano in front of him.
‘Good as new.’
‘I’m glad to hear that,’ he said. ‘You really did flatten yourself on the floor at that service station.’
‘I was in agony,’ she said, ‘but trying not to show it.’
‘I could see it all the same. I was worried about you driving to Bordeaux.’
‘I didn’t make it that far.’
‘No. But you got to Pamplona. And El Pozo de la Señora. I felt flattered when I saw you there. But obviously for the wrong reasons.’
‘Look,’ she said. ‘You know from what I said that night that I was in a terrible place mentally. I was unhinged. Obsessed by what had happened with my boyfriend and his new girlfriend, obsessed with how devastated I felt, obsessed – as you know – by the fact that she was nearly half my age and going to have a baby, and what that represented for me. And I was obsessed in thinking that motherhood might have passed me by. It was physical, that obsession. It had taken me over.’
‘It didn’t seem that way in Pamplona.’
‘It came to the surface in waves,’ she said. ‘But it was there all the time. Bubbling away. Ready to erupt. Unfortunately, you were in the firing line when it did.’
‘I got the feeling that you put me in the firing line,’ he said.
‘Yes. I did. And I regret it very much. Most of all, I regret that you had to share information with me that you wouldn’t have wanted to share. I embarrassed you as much as myself, and yes, all this is only to make me feel better, but I do want you to know that I was looking at every man I saw as a prospective father for my child. Every man who didn’t look like a psycho was a possibility. No matter who, no matter where. I was a . . . a maternal predator stalking the country.’
‘And now?’
‘My ex and his partner have had their baby. I’ve agreed a