to it someday. However, having a child – would that ever happen? She still didn’t know. Nevertheless, she realised that in the last few days she hadn’t looked at a man and wondered if he could be the possible father of her child. She hadn’t thought about getting pregnant every minute. She hadn’t almost doubled over in pain every time she saw a mother and baby. Which wasn’t to say that might not happen again. It was simply that right now, at this moment, she’d managed to put that particular desire and longing into a space in her head that didn’t need to be accessed. And for the next few weeks, despite the precarious state of her eggs, she wasn’t going to access it.
‘It’s weird to be back sooner than I expected,’ said Grace after they’d collected their bags and gone through passport control. ‘It goes to show, doesn’t it, that you can make as many plans as you like, but they can come to nothing.’
Deira nodded and followed her into the arrivals hall, where, almost immediately, Grace gave a cry of delight and waved at a tall woman holding a toddler in her arms. The woman was a younger version of Grace herself. Less elegant, Deira thought, but with the same fine features and blue eyes. The toddler, when he saw Grace, squirmed in his mother’s grip and held out his arms towards his grandmother.
‘Who’s my best boy!’ cried Grace as she lifted him towards her and smothered him in kisses. ‘Who’s the person I’ve missed the most in the world?’
‘Not me, I’m guessing.’ The woman gave her an amused look. ‘Hello, Mum.’
‘Aline, sweetheart, it’s lovely to see you. Thank you for coming to pick me up. This is my friend Deira.’
Aline held out her hand. ‘Pleased to meet you,’ she said. ‘Mum’s talked about you a lot.’
‘And about you,’ said Deira. ‘It’s nice to finally meet you.’
‘Thank you for travelling with her,’ said Aline.
‘I was lucky she asked me,’ Deira said. ‘Otherwise I might have been stuck in Nantes for the duration. As it is, we had a fabulous trip together.’
‘But you cut it short, Mum.’ Aline frowned. ‘You weren’t terribly clear why in your phone call. Plus you’ll still have to go back to bring the car home.’
‘I know, I know,’ said Grace. ‘But that’s not for over a month. I can be home for a few days in the meantime.’
‘Of course you can,’ said Aline. ‘It’s just—’
‘We can talk about it later,’ said Grace. ‘Right now, I think we should make a move.’ She turned to Deira. ‘Are you absolutely sure you want to take a taxi? It’s no trouble to drop you home.’
‘It would be madness for you to even think about it,’ said Deira. ‘It’s close to rush hour and I’m on the other side of the city. Go home with your family and . . . well, we’ll talk soon.’
‘Absolutely,’ said Grace. ‘Take care of yourself.’ She handed Declan back to Aline and hugged Deira. ‘As soon as I have the USB, I’ll call you.’
‘OK.’
‘You’ll be all right, won’t you?’
‘Of course I will.’
‘Talk soon.’ Grace gave her another hug and then picked up her grandson again. ‘My goodness, you’re getting to be a big boy,’ she said. ‘Soon I won’t be able to lift you at all.’
Deira watched as they walked out of the terminal building together, then made her way to the taxi rank.
Other than asking her for her address, the taxi driver didn’t speak and, grateful for the silence, she tipped him generously when he pulled up outside the house. Before going in, she opened the post box and took out the accumulated mail. There wasn’t much – she’d signed up to paperless billing for most things, and nobody sent personal letters any more. But she identified the documents from the insurance company straight away.
She put her key in the lock and stepped inside.
She walked past the tied bag of rubbish that Bex had left in the hallway and climbed the stairs. Another time she would have raged at her niece for not putting it in the bin outside, but now she didn’t care.
Her bedroom door was open and the scent that lingered very faintly in the air was Gillian’s. Her sister always wore strong fragrances. But apart from the traces of Black Opium, everything was exactly as she’d left it and there were no other signs that anyone had slept in her room. Even the sex toys that Gillian had