this moment, and I’ll thank you for giving me what I asked for.”
Journey looked at me like I was crazy, and he was right.
I was crazy. About him.
“You want me to deliberately keep something from you,” he asked slowly.
“Yes, I do,” I said and glanced away.
I was desperate to keep this, to hold on to yet another something good that had come into my life, something that was about to slip away like everything else had.
“No expectations or pressure. If you want me in your bed, then I’m here. If you don’t, then I’m not. Okay?” I knew it wasn’t ideal, but I was determined to make the best beautiful life for myself that I could, even if it didn’t last.
Journey was quiet a long time. I glanced up to find him frowning. I was afraid he was going to turn me down, and my heart sank. But he threw me a lifeline.
“I don’t want you only in my bed. I want you around all the time,” he said, not just tossing me a lifeline to keep me from drowning, but reeling me in. “I want you involved in every aspect of my life. I want full access to your life, and you’ll have the same to mine. My door is always open to you. And to Cork. In fact, I’ll give you both keys.”
“Okay,” I said, my eyes wide.
“Good.” Journey gave me a firm nod. “I want full disclosure to your brother about us. He suspects already, but I want you to fill him in about what’s going on.”
“What is going on?” I asked in a whisper.
“Us.”
“Oh.” My lips parted in wonder.
“You have my agreement to your request.” He searched my eyes. “What’s your answer to all of mine?”
“Yes.” I didn’t hesitate. I wanted those things.
Journey’s frown turned into a slow grin. My heart fluttered, and other parts of me warmed.
I wasn’t completely unaware of the risk. Giving Journey full access to my life and Cork’s with his secret in the background was dangerous. It wasn’t only me that could be hurt. But I believed in the good I saw in Journey. I only hoped my faith in him wasn’t misplaced.
“Great.” He reached for me, his long fingers curling around my upper arms. “So, what should we do now? With both of us in bed and awake?”
He didn’t wait for a reply. Lifting me, he deposited me on my back in the center of his bed and stared down at me. His eyes were the color of earth made warm by the sun, the green flecks like new growth.
I reached for him, framing one side of his face in my hand. His whiskers were soft, his gaze softer. He stared at me in wonder as if I were a gift. He was to me, one totally unexpected.
It seemed that each of us had taken leaps of faith just now, bigger than we ever had before.
As I returned his perusal, words rose from my yearning heart. They teetered on the tip of my tongue, but I didn’t speak them. A secret silenced, a promise given, I’d agreed to his requests. Now wasn’t the time or the place.
But I’d gained additional time. Maybe later there would be a better time and place for the words I wanted to say to him.
I glided my fingers across his beard and dove them into his hair. Tugging on the silky strands, I brought his handsome face, his tempting lips, and him closer.
“Lotus,” he said softly. “You’re so fucking hot.”
“You are,” I whispered, and he grinned.
His bicep bulged as he balanced on one arm and brushed my hair to the side. Revealing the halter tie at my neck, he undid it and peeled the loosened bodice down. Cool air rushed over my naked skin, but the appreciation in his gaze warmed me.
“Your skin’s so soft.” His eyes lifting, he held me spellbound as he touched me. Slowly, he drew with his thumb over the slope of one breast and then the other before circling my nipple. “You’re so sexy, so incredibly responsive to my touch.”
My mouth parting, I moaned. My back arched off the mattress as he circled again, only around the other nipple. Already tight, both throbbed from his touch. I moaned again, my lids fluttering as he rolled the tip between his finger and thumb.
Watching me closely, he moved to the other side and repeated the procedure. His twists sent fiery bolts straight to my clit. Back and forth, he alternated while watching