Journey, my doubts were gone. I was ready to move on.
I ate the sandwich that Journey unwrapped and handed to me. After seeing to me, he offered food to Sophia and Reese, but they were too busy making out to respond.
“Nice of you to offer,” I said from behind my hand, munching on a turkey avocado on whole wheat with a little spicy mayo. “This is fantastic. Thank you.”
“You already thanked me.” Journey reclaimed his seat beside me, tipped back his beer, and then rubbed the back of his neck. He seemed almost embarrassed by my praise. “It’s not a big deal, but I’m glad you like it.”
“It’s a big deal to me.” I was unaccustomed to anyone else looking out for me. Taking another huge bite, I chewed and then swallowed while formulating words to explain. “You went and got the food with me in mind, right?”
“You, the guys, Sophia. Yeah.”
“That’s thoughtful. It took time. It involved you spending your money, and you expended physical effort to bring it here to the beach. I saw you moving the ice chest across the sand.”
“Not much, L—Lotus.”
I set down the sandwich and reached for his hand, squeezing it while holding his gaze. “Something that’s not much to you means a lot to me. Time’s precious. Money’s short. Any effort on my behalf is important. It’s caring, and caring should never be dismissed. So, thank you for caring for me. Truly.”
“God, I missed— I mean, it’s been a long time since I talked to someone like you.”
Considering his words, I tilted my head and picked up my sandwich again. I wasn’t going to let a bite of it go to waste, nor a single drop of my beer. Everything about this night, I planned to consume, and while consuming, to savor.
I liked Journey, and he liked me. I didn’t need to make it any more complicated than that.
“So, what kind of people do you usually talk to?” I asked a broad question on my quest to learn more about him. It wasn’t only his good looks, the mystery surrounding him, or his skill on the guitar that intrigued me.
“Studio execs, band managers, other musicians,” he said, his gaze drifting over me. Was he having difficulty focusing around me the way I was around him? “No one like you.”
His eyes darkened. He seemed to appreciate my denim shorts overalls and the hot pink tube top I’d paired with them. I certainly liked his muscle shirt and jeans. Or maybe it was more the way he filled them out. His broad shoulders stretched the cotton, and his deltoids strained the frayed arm holes of his tee.
My gaze met his after a drifting of my own. Were my eyes darker? He’d been watching me check him out. My cheeks warmed as his lips curved.
“Don’t you have any friends that you talk to about non-work stuff?” I narrowed my field of questioning.
“Some.” He glanced across the fire. Reese and Sophia had disappeared beneath a blanket.
“Reese?” I asked.
“Yeah, he’s cool.” Journey took another sip of his beer, and I watched his Adam’s apple move as he swallowed while peering at me through his thick lashes.
“But you’re leaving the group.”
“It was a temporary gig. I knew that going in. I prefer temporary. I don’t form lasting attachments. It’s time for me to move on.”
“Where are you going next?”
“I’m not sure yet.” He gave me a long look. “I got thrown a huge curveball tonight, so it depends.”
“Depends on what?” I tilted my head.
His lips flattened. “Can we not talk about plans and serious stuff?”
“What do you want to talk about instead?” I asked, trying to keep the hurt out of my tone that he’d shut me down.
“I don’t know.” His gaze moved to the ocean, and he took another swig of his beer. Then he set the empty aluminum can on the sand and smashed it with his booted foot. “I don’t usually do a lot of talking with chicks.”
“Right.”
Temporary. No attachments. No sharing. In a roundabout way, he was letting me know what this was.
Finished with my sandwich, I crumpled the plastic wrapping into a ball and tossed it into the ice chest. In a more straightforward fashion, I decided to let him know about me.
“I don’t usually kiss a guy I just met.”
His gaze snapped to me.
“I get what you’re trying to tell me,” I said. “But I thought I’d just go ahead and let you know straight up about me.”
“Something that hasn’t changed,” he said