I lifted my chin and withdrew my hand from his.
“But don’t get your hopes up,” Saber said, giving me a hard look. “Or get the idea that spending time with her is going to give you a shot with her.”
I shook my head at him in disbelief. He just couldn’t resist getting in the last word.
“Remember,” Saber said. “Lotus chose me before and after she was with you. She and I are a done deal.”
Lotus
“TO THE SUNSET.” I raised my glass along with everyone else at the Deck Bar. As usual, my glass only held sparkling water with lime.
Each evening, everyone paused, employees and patrons alike, to acknowledge the sunset over the water. The display varied. Today, it was spectacular. Cotton-candy cloud streamers and a flaming ball of orange melded to a baby-blue sky over a dark navy sea.
“Cork is surfing circles around everyone out there,” Jeff said, pointing with his empty shot glass at the ocean. “Is that boy finally gonna start surfing competitively again?”
“No.” My denial was instant, though I wouldn’t go into the reasons with Jeff.
He was a nice guy, but he was only a coworker, not a confidant. He certainly had no way of knowing that by asking, he dredged up painful memories of the countless times where I had to be the grown-up, making the difficult decision to deny Cork something he loved so much. Competitive surfing was just too dangerous for my brother now.
“That’s too bad.” Jeff clucked his tongue. “He’s amazing out there. Makes the rest of the crew with him look like amateurs.”
Numb, I nodded, trying not to worry about Cork being out there on the water without me watching over him. Finally, I lost the battle I’d been waging with myself all day.
“Cover for me,” I said, tossing my bar towel on the counter. I slipped through the gap in the bar and almost ran to the windows. I had to get a better look.
“Sure thing.”
Jeff’s voice faded, replaced by the steady murmur of patrons and recorded music in the background. It was a miracle I could hear anything over the worried heartbeat slamming in my ears.
Stopping behind a couple sitting at the low counter beneath the ocean-facing windows, I scanned the surf. I found my brother, recognizing the flash of his blond hair and the effortless way he moved. Even from fifty yards away, I could practically feel his joy.
Cork needed his freedom. It was the right decision, letting him go with Journey. But knowing I was doing the right thing didn’t make it any easier.
“Lotus!”
I jumped to attention. The disapproval in my boss’s tone was becoming all too familiar.
“Not paying you to stand at the window, looking at the view.”
“Sorry, Mr. Macari. I got distracted.” I ducked my head and hurried back to my position at the bar.
My cheeks burned as I went to the sink and rewashed my hands. Turning back around, I could see my boss watching me, his arms crossed over his chest. I began working on a drink order while risking occasional glances out the window, trying to figure out who was with my brother.
His companions all looked like black blobs on the waves, except for one. Journey’s wide shoulders and cocky posture, even on his board, was unmistakable.
My heart did a little flutter—okay, a huge flutter. Yeah, I was falling for him, and it was more than just the fact that he and my brother got along.
With effort, I managed to set thoughts of Journey and worry about my brother aside. I needed to concentrate on my work. As I filled another large order quickly and efficiently, my boss finally turned away.
Able to breathe again, I relaxed into the familiar rhythm of my job. I spun back and forth between my customers and the wall of alcohol behind me, taking care of table orders at one end of the bar while filling and refilling drinks for those standing or seated along the rest of it. Bartending was a highly physical job, much like dancing. It involved finesse, showmanship, and being a good listener, as much as mixing drinks in the proper proportions.
Most evenings, I enjoyed it. But tonight, I was too distracted to fully relax into it.
I was pouring Cuervo into a row of shot glasses for a couple of SDSU students when I felt the dynamic suddenly shift inside the bar. When I turned my head in the direction nearly everyone else was looking, my jaw dropped.
A group of men stood at the