It had almost started to feel like Alex was making a friend. He didn’t have many of those. Acquaintances, yes. Plenty of those. Alex even called them his friends, but that’s not really what they were. So yeah, he had acquaintances, but friends? Did he even have any?
This line of thinking was getting depressing, so Alex turned his attention back to Noah instead.
“You haven’t been around much this week,” he said, not even knowing if he was going for a casual observation or a question.
“Yeah. My mom had this conference in Seattle, and I promised to go with her ages ago. Had the plane ticket booked and everything.” He offered no more information, and Alex didn’t ask.
“Cool,” he said, instead.
“Look,” Noah said, “about last week. I’m sorry.”
Alex considered the words. “What exactly are you apologizing about?”
Noah flushed the subtlest shade of pink, barely visible because of the tan, but it was there, and for some reason, it made Alex feel better and calmer at once.
“I acted like a nutjob. It must have been weird as fuck to witness,” he said, refusing to meet Alex’s gaze, choosing instead to concentrate on the enclosure, where a couple of foxes were crazing around in the distance, seemingly bored out of their minds. It gave Alex a chance to look at Noah. God damnit, he was stupid, but he couldn’t stop himself. He really liked the view.
“I think I’m the one who should be apologizing,” Alex said. “I was the one who kissed you. I shouldn’t have… attacked you like I did.”
“No,” Noah said quickly. “No. It’s… that was fine. Very good job on the kiss. I didn’t feel attacked at all.”
“You obviously did,” Alex argued. “And that’s not even the point. You didn’t want the kiss, so I shouldn’t have done it.”
“I wanted it,” Noah blurted. “I wanted it,” he repeated. Voice quiet. Eyes downcast.
Alex opened his mouth to argue, but stopped himself. “You’re kind of sending me mixed signals here.”
Noah groaned and dropped his head back. “You’re right. I’m an asshole.”
“It’s not quite what I said.”
“But it’s what you meant.”
Alex laughed. “Stop putting words into my mouth.”
Noah’s eyes immediately landed on Alex’s lips, and for a moment he just stared and then flushed a much deeper shade of red than before. Alex felt his breath hitch. He would’ve given everything he owned to know what Noah had been thinking about right then.
The moment was gone as soon as it had happened. Noah’s eyes skittered away, and Alex tried his hardest to tamp down the disappointment he felt at the realization that no matter how hard he wished, there was not going to be an act two.
“I just wanted to confirm that we’re fine. And that maybe…” Noah looked down at the ground again.
“Maybe?” Alex prompted.
“Ugh!” Noah huffed out a breath. “I feel stupid. Like I’m a kindergartner or something. Okay, here goes. I wanted to ask you if you wanted to be friends. With me. And that sounded extremely lame. You probably think it’s a waste of your time.”
“I don’t think spending time with you is a waste of time,” Alex hurried to say before Noah could do something stupid like take back the offer.
Noah smiled hesitantly, but he wasn’t done yet. “Here’s the thing. I like you,” he said. Alex was really digging that blunt part of Noah’s character. He never would have guessed Noah had it in him to be that forthright. He didn’t seem like one of those guys who had a lot of experience. In fact, from what Alex had learned about Noah so far, he seemed very sheltered. Innocent even.
“I like you a lot,” Noah repeated, “but we can only be friends.”
Alex regarded Noah curiously. His first thought was, straight, damnit. But the way Noah looked at him? There was definite interest in his eyes. The way Noah’s gaze lingered just a bit too long and the way he tracked Alex’s movements screamed interest. And that kiss…
But Noah had said just friends. And even though it seemed to Alex that there was a lot left unsaid with that statement, and Alex was dying to dig in and see what lay beneath the surface, he doubted Noah would open up to him right then. They were still relative strangers. Yeah, Noah liked him, and yeah, Alex was definitely attracted to the guy, but that didn’t mean he could expect Noah to spill all his secrets right away, so friends seemed like the best option.
Maybe even the first step