swirling around the knuckles and nails.
“That feels better than it should,” I said.
He shook his head, like a tiger that had a small animal in its mouth. It showed dominance. And it showed how much he owned me because, even if his teeth were piercing my skin, I wouldn’t pull my hand away.
“Everything I do to you is going to feel good.” He surrounded my pinkie with his lips, the only finger he hadn’t sucked yet. “But you weren’t about to tell me how good I made you feel. You were about to say something much more serious than that.”
When I looked down at my feet, I felt his hand on my chin, stopping it from dropping any farther.
“No. I want you to look at me.”
He wasn’t going to let me get out of this. I didn’t just have to confess. I had to look at him while I was doing it.
Just a few days ago, I’d told him I’d loved him since I was a kid. I’d told him I still did. But saying I love you felt different.
“I need a minute.”
“I’m not giving you a minute,” he said. “I want the answer now.”
I finally met his eyes. “My feelings were coming to the surface.”
“Tell me what they are.”
“You know already.”
“Tell me again.”
How could I tell him I loved him when I was lying to him at the same time? Lying about something that really mattered. Lying about something that would change everything between us.
What we had was based on a lie.
The lie was woven into my answers, in my thoughts, in what had happened between us…what would continue happening, I was sure. It would affect the way he felt about me.
It should affect the way he felt.
Breathe, Kyle.
So, the only thing that made sense was to lie more. I couldn’t drag him into this any further. He was already in far enough. He knew he had my body; I couldn’t lie about that. But my heart? I could push him away emotionally. I could make sure his feelings didn’t deepen, like mine had. It would be too late if that happened.
Breathe, Kyle.
Then, he would really hate me once he found out I wasn’t who he thought I was.
Then…
Kyle.
“I think it was a good thing that I left all those years ago.” My stare deepened as I tried to read him, something I hadn’t been successful at since we’d been locked in here. “We’re too different. Not just our lifestyles, but also our personalities. You were crazy about women back then. From what you’ve told me, it sounds like that hasn’t changed at all.”
“What are you saying?”
“I’m saying…” It wasn’t true, so it hurt to even think this. It hurt to let the words marinate on my tongue. But because he was able to read me so well, I had to sound believable. “I would never be able to trust you.”
“Kyle—”
“You’re entertaining. That’s all. When your tongue was on my clit and your cock was inside me, I didn’t think about being in this cell. I was thankful they had placed me in here with you. But, now that I know how talented you are, I’m even more thankful.” I even hated the tone I was using. This wasn’t me. Not the words, not the sarcasm. Definitely not the harshness.
He knew that, too.
“You’re saying I’m nothing more than a distraction?”
No.
I shrugged. “Your dick is one of the best I’ve had. So, yes.”
“You feel nothing in here?” His hand pressed against my chest. It was a surprisingly forceful move, but it didn’t hurt.
My comments had hurt. The way I nodded my head…hurt.
“I don’t believe you,” he barked.
“It’s true.”
“Your eyes are telling me a much different story.”
I didn’t have time to prepare myself before his lips crashed against mine, his tongue filling the space in between. It wasn’t just passionate. It was the kind of kiss someone gave before they said good-bye. A kiss that was memorable.
“Your lips are telling me a much different story.” His hands moved to my waist, and he lifted my tank over my head. “If this wasn’t the only shirt you had, I would have ripped the fucking thing off you.”
He knelt on the floor and peeled my pants off. My bra and panties came off shortly after.
I couldn’t tell him to stop. I couldn’t reach for his hands and still them. I was frozen in pure elation, knowing I would get to be close to him again, knowing I would get to feel his emotions.