parks her car in the driveway. She looks up through the windshield, hesitation clear on her face, and that gorgeous vulnerability shining in her doe eyes.
My flower.
I try not to assume that she’s come for me. That once again we desire the same. A harsh lump forms in my throat, the spikes threatening to suffocate me. My hands clench and unclench in the chill of the air starts to affect me.
I ignore all of it, walking to her driver door and opening it. She looks up at me warily as I offer her my hand. Please don’t deny me, my flower. Be here for me. Please.
Her hand feels so small, so warm in mine. I’ve always known we were different, but I’ve grown to love how she compliments me. She brings out a side to me that I don’t want to lose.
We share look, I’m not sure what mine reflects to her, but her’s undeniably sends a chill through my body. She’s looking at me as though she doesn’t know what I’m thinking. I’ve seen it on her face a dozen times or more.
She should know what she means to me. And the fact that she doesn’t makes me nervous. I’m not a man who likes to be nervous. It’s not a comfortable feeling.
My hand splays on the small of her back, but I’m quick to pull her in close, wrapping my arm around her waist and holding her small body into mine as I lead her inside.
When I peek down at her, lowering myself to the ground to pick up my keys that are now freezing and coated with a thin layer of snow, I see a small smile on her lips. Nothing in my life has made me feel better. She makes me feel secure and wanted. I’ll never let her go. Never. When you find someone who makes you feel like this, there’s no reason to ever give her a reason to walk away.
She shivers in the doorway as I unlock the door, opening it and allowing the warmth of my home to spread through us both. Her heels click in the foyer as she continues walking without me. I close the door with my back to her, taking a deep breath. She came back to me. I can’t let her leave. I close my eyes at that thought, realizing that’s not what she needs. I need to give her a reason to stay of her own free will. I can’t keep her here, but knowing that she’s come here has to mean something.
I turn slowly to face her, her ankles cross slightly and she sways, standing there in the middle of the open doorway, her hands clasped and her coat hanging in the crook of her arm. She looks just as nervous as I feel. The sight of her reminds me of the first day I had her here. The same uncertainty, and just like before I know I’ll soothe her worries. If only she let me.
“I want you to stay for another month,” I offer her, my voice echoes off the empty walls, walking to her and standing just inches in front of her. Technically our contract isn’t over yet, Valentine’s Day is tomorrow. But I want to bind her with the contract if I can. I don’t want the days to pass and have no claim to her.
“Just a month?” she asks a look flashing in her eyes. I like hearing the words “yes sir” from her lips. But this may be even better.
“You want more, my flower?” I hope she says yes. Whatever she tells me she wants I’ll give her. I just need her to tell me.
I finally feel like I have a reason to live. And a future to look forward to with Lilly. I can give her whatever she needs. Whatever she asks for, I would happily provide her with. I’m sure she’s realized that by now. Without her with me, I was clinging to the past just to feel. I don’t want that anymore. I want her; all of her.
“I care for you Lilly,” I stare into her eyes as I tell her, for the first time I think in my entire life making my feelings known for someone else. I feel vulnerable in this moment, she looks back at me not answering. She could reject me. It would crush me if she did.
My thumb rubs along her cheek as I cup her chin in my hand. Her hands,