back then about my decided lack of interest in… well, everybody. I went out on dates, but”—I shake my head—“You know what, that part doesn’t really matter. Cee was auditing a company we were representing at the time, and there was a court case involved, so we spent a lot of time together, and we became friends. Everything else—dating and actually being attracted to her—that followed after.”
“What are you saying?” Kai asks.
“I’m saying”—I take a step closer—“that I don’t get attracted to people that easily. In fact, it almost never happens.” I take another step closer. “So I don’t think we can draw any fundamental conclusions about my sexuality. And maybe we don’t have to. I’ve never felt the need to label myself before, so why can’t I just say that I’m more attracted to you than I’ve ever been to anybody else”—I erase the last few inches that separate us and slide my palm down his side, enjoying the way heat radiates through his T-shirt—“and I want to explore whatever this here is.”
My lips are only a hairsbreadth away from Kai’s. “I want you so much it fucking hurts,” I say in a low voice as I look him deep in the eyes searchingly. “Tell me you don’t want me, too, and I’ll back off. Tell me you don’t think about kissing me again, and I’ll never bring it up again. Tell me you don’t want to have my taste on your tongue. Tell me you’re not curious to see what my body feels like against yours.”
Kai’s eyes haven’t left me the whole time I’ve been speaking, and the moment the last word has left my lips, he lunges and slams his mouth down on mine.
For a moment, I’m so surprised that I don’t even dare to breath, but I catch on to what is happening in record speed. My arms wrap around Kai, my heart violently slamming in my chest, and I can feel his heart beating against mine as we’re standing there, glued together from toes to hips to chests to lips.
I’m surrounded by Kai. I feel him everywhere, and yet I desperately try to pull him even closer because he’s still too far away. Air molecules are having a hard time squeezing between the two of us by this point, but I still want more.
Kai’s tongue slides against my bottom lip, and I immediately open for him. I can’t get enough of his taste. It’s intoxicating.
Kai’s fingers move into my hair, clutching at the strands like he’s holding on for dear life. My palm is pressed against the small of Kai’s back, and my other hand is on Kai’s cheek. His stubble scratches my palm, sending shivers of pleasure down my spine.
My rumble of pleasure makes Kai deepen the kiss even more. He has lost all the hesitation from before and has thrown himself fully into the kiss.
Kai gives no warning as he pulls me back toward the couch. We land on it without finesse with Kai underneath me. We kiss like we’ve been starving for each other. Kai’s hands move over my back, sliding up and down. His fingers hook to the back of my neck, and he’s sliding his fingers through the short hair at the base of my neck.
The hard body beneath me is fucking sexy in a whole new way. I want to explore, but our position doesn’t give me many options, so I try to roll us around, which isn’t exactly the height of good judgment, since it results in me falling off the couch.
I blink as I stare at the ceiling until Kai’s smiling face appears above me.
“Smooth,” he says.
With one quick tug, I have him just where I want him most—on top of me. He’s not smiling anymore. Instead, he presses his forehead against mine.
“What the fuck are we doing?” he murmurs.
I wiggle until our bodies align perfectly before I nip at his lips, making Kai suck in his breath in the process. I think right now it’s better to try and lighten the mood a bit.
“Isn’t it obvious?” I murmur against his lips. “We’re working on my happy list.”
20
Kai
I stare at the way the patch of moonlight moves over the floorboards of my room. The slow journey from one side of the room to the other has taken forever, and I know it because I’ve been a silent observer of it for hours already.
I flop on my back and close my eyes, trying to relax, but the moment