than done, Dr. Colson,” Eli says. “It’s hard not to be defensive or give a reason why I did what I did.”
“Maybe it’s hard,” I reply. “But do you realize you crushed her? Do you realize you destroyed her when you did what you did? She gave you herself, and it takes a lot for a person to give themselves completely. It takes a level of trust and respect most people don't even have in them to begin with. She gave herself to you, and you shattered the gift she gave you. You broke her.”
Eli looks at me with a pain in his face I haven't seen in him before. I watch as the realization of his actions finally dawns on him, and I can tell it’s hitting him for the first time with the pressure of a thousand bricks being dropped on top of him. I recognize it in him now, and it might just be the breakthrough he needs exactly when he needs it.
“I know you're a strong-minded person, Eli,” I finish, hammering my point home. “You’ve earned your success by using that strong mind and going against the grain. You don't like being told what to do, because you're used to being the boss. Your company goes where you say it goes. But things with Demi are different now. You're not allowed to be defiant anymore. When you feel that defensiveness creeping up on you, just ask yourself a simple question.”
“What’s that?” Eli asks, his voice low and drained of confidence.
“How badly do you want your marriage to work?”
Eli looks at me, his eyes quickly filling with tears.
“More than anything,” he says.
I nod my head. “Good. Don't forget that when you feel like defending your mistake. You have to humble yourself. Let Demi take control of where the relationship moves and how fast. Give her control, and don't fight to take it back. You're in her world from now on. Got it?”
It takes a minute, but Eli slowly nods. “Yeah. I got it.”
DAWN
15
~ Demi ~
When I step out of the room and see Eli standing in the kitchen holding his Eagles coffee mug, it’s the first time I’ve seen him in almost twenty-four hours. I’ve made it a point to stay away from him since he tried to apologize while also blaming me for his transgressions. There hasn't even been a text message sent between us, and I’m not sure we’ve ever been so distant. He just can't seem to say or do the right thing these days, and I can't seem to control my anger with him, so our last few conversations have broken into arguments that end with slammed doors and crushed feelings.
Seeing him now fills me with a plethora of undiagnosed emotions. He’s still the gorgeous man he’s always been, but my eyes don't register it the way they used to. Now, he’s the man who never appreciated me. He's the man who chose another woman over our vows, and couldn't find it in himself to apologize until after he was caught, and no matter how hard I look, my eyes can't see past that right now. I wonder if they ever will be able to.
When I walk out of the bedroom and stride down the hall towards the kitchen, Eli turns to look at me. I’m torn when I see him. I want to hug and kiss him because I still love him, and I also want to grab his coffee cup from his hands and thrust it into his face. I decide to do neither of those things and simply ignore him instead.
I walk over to the fridge and pull out a Tupperware dish filled with hard-boiled eggs for me to take to work. I set the dish on the counter and give my attention to the coffee maker, filling it with grounds and water before pressing the button for it to brew. While it starts, I keep my back to Eli because I don't want to see him, but instead of staying silent and defiant like I’m used to, Eli speaks first.
“Good morning,” he says, and I immediately fill with rage. Maybe it’d be a good morning if he hadn't cheated with his slut of a secretary. My mornings are bad mornings now, and it’s his fault.
“Morning,” I reply without turning around. I expect him to say something else, but he doesn't. He sips his coffee without another word.
Love is a strange emotion. Its power is insane, and I truly hate