sense.
Zab came back to light the fire for us as the daylight waned without either of us asking.
“I’ll get a light,” Rabbit said, grabbing the nearest candle, trying to be helpful.
I’d given up on any pretense of my magic working. If I helped, we’d be in worse shape, so I sat there awkwardly, pretending to be intrigued in a book I couldn’t understand. I must’ve grabbed some sort of advanced magic, because even the words were a muddled mess.
Hawk stepped into the room. I knew the second he did because I always sat up a little straighter. Then I slouched again, because I hated my reaction. I’d narrowed my sensitivity in his area down to either an inferiority complex on my part, because I continually failed in front of him, or the fact that he always noticed me and it made me self-conscious. It was definitely one of those two for sure.
He wasn’t looking at me this time, though. His attention was on Rabbit. Out of curiosity, I glanced over my shoulder to see why she’d snagged his attention. Was there something brewing there I hadn’t realized? I mean, she was a cute girl. Much nicer than Belinda. And if he favored her, then that was just wonderful. I’d be happy for them both.
Then I saw what she was up to and wanted to cringe for her. She was holding her fingers to a candle, but all it was doing was smoking. Mine didn’t light at all, but I’d never seen one do that. From the deep red of her face, it wasn’t a defective candle.
“I’m sure you had a long day. I got it,” Zab said, walking over and lighting it for her.
She smiled and nodded, not meeting anyone’s gaze and more interested in the floorboards.
I should’ve stopped looking sooner, but alarm bells were ringing and throwing me off my game. She caught my eye and shook her hand out before clenching it in front of her. “It’s not a big deal. It always happens to me when my fingers are cold,” she said, adding a little nervous laugh that sounded something closer to a siren blaring in my head.
I smiled back, pretending that I didn’t realize anything was wrong and that whatever was happening with her magic was fine.
“Well, I’m beat. Going to head on to bed,” Rabbit said, taking the candle with her.
I caught Hawk giving Rabbit’s back another glance before she disappeared. Zab followed her out, and I knew he was going to find an excuse to go light her fire upstairs, the way he always did.
I waited until the sound of their footsteps on the stairs faded.
“Are you ready to practice?” Hawk asked.
For once, that question was not what put me in a worse mood. “What’s wrong with Rabbit? I saw the way you were looking at her when the candle didn’t light.”
“It’s not my place to say.” He took a few steps closer, his brows a little lower and a solemn look about his eyes.
I shook my head and slumped farther into the couch. I was so tired of not knowing what was going on—not knowing what everyone wanted and not being able to do anything about it. I wanted to lean forward and crack my head on the corner of the wooden table in front of me and call it a day. I didn’t have that luxury, since this problem wasn’t about me. If there was something wrong with Rabbit, I wanted to know, and I was tired of sidestepping an issue everyone else knew about.
“We don’t have an honest and open relationship. I get that. We’re together because we have to be, and I understand that as well. But something is happening with her, and everyone seems to know what it is but me. Please, tell me. Maybe I can help her, but I don’t even know what the problem is.”
He shook his head. “Tippi, you’re an outsider here. You have to realize it’s not something that is discussed.”
I didn’t want to be here. I’d made no bones about it. So why did it feel like I’d gotten sucker-punched when he called me an outsider? It didn’t matter, so I shook it off. I’d wallow another day when I could afford to care. This moment, I was going to get answers.
“It’s clearly not a secret if everyone else knows. She’s one of my only friends.”
He looked the other way. When he finally turned back to me, I could see the lines of