open and my brains would tumble out, completely scrambled.
“Trust me, God has nothing to do with grouslies. Put your legs out straight.”
I did as he asked, and he sprinkled them with an iridescent dust. It hurt, but not as much as the stinging. This was more like a splash of disinfectant on a very big cut. The longer the dust was on my skin, the more it began to numb, finally offering some relief.
“Flip over,” he said, moving to the backs of my legs.
He was more than halfway done when I could think clearly enough to ask, “Is there something strange about the grouslies leaving on their own?” I looked at him over my shoulder.
His eyes met mine. “Grouslies don’t attack and retreat. They attack and kill, unless you fight them off. Most witches and warlocks can’t fight off a grouslie attack unless they’re at least a lower-end Braw.”
The evil in the forest was from the Unsettled Lands. These grouslies were from the Unsettled Lands. Raydam wanted to help the evil in the Unsettled Lands. I hadn’t given Raydam a firm answer, but I knew how badly I lied. There were a few too many things pointing toward Raydam being behind this. Maybe they hadn’t killed me because this had been a warning.
If I asked Hawk if Raydam was behind this, he’d know I was turning Raydam down. I wasn’t willing to fess up to that just yet. I’d rather see how long Hawk’s patience would last. How fast he’d be willing to throw me out. I wanted to know how much trust he really had in me or if we had a relationship built on facade only. But that didn’t mean I couldn’t ask at all. I just couldn’t spell it out.
He was nearly to my knees, so I had a small window in which to try to slip the question past him. “Do you think that maybe the grouslies could’ve been controlled by someone who saw me with you and was afraid I was going to help you?”
He covered the last part of my leg. “It wasn’t Raydam.”
What was the deal? Did I blast every thought I had at him somehow?
“I didn’t say it was Raydam. I’m just wondering if maybe someone else who saw us on your little tour might’ve done something.” Why did I have to be the worst at duplicity? Why couldn’t I have learned something about lying in my nearly twenty years of living?
He gestured for me to turn back over while he looked for spots he might’ve missed.
He sat back on his haunches, studying me. “It wasn’t Raydam. I don’t know anyone who’s ever been able to command grouslies, and he certainly wouldn’t be the first.” He stood and grabbed some fabric strips he’d had laid out.
I kept my attention on him, too afraid to see my legs.
“If someone other than Raydam was in cahoots with the dark, evil thing, they might be able to control the grouslies,” I said.
He made quick work of wrapping one leg and tucked in the fabric. “It’s not Raydam and it’s not one of his goons. This has nothing to do with trying to change your mind or getting back at you. I don’t think he realizes you’re declining him yet.”
Did I still have to stay calm? I hoped not, because my heart was pounding.
“Of course he doesn’t, because I haven’t decided yet. I might not decline him. How could Raydam know my decision when I don’t know it?”
Hawk looked up, raised his brows while saying nothing, and then went back to what he was doing.
“I don’t know.” I mean, I was leaning a certain way, but it might change. It probably wouldn’t, but I didn’t believe in saying never. There still might’ve been a fraction of a percent of me thinking of moving over to Raydam’s camp, even if the thought did make my skin crawl. Weirder things could happen.
Hawk tucked in the last strip of fabric. “You do know, but if you want to keep it to yourself for a while, I don’t have a problem with that.”
“How is it keeping it to myself if you already know?” And he knew that as well. If he was really fine, like he said, why point it out?
“I didn’t say you were good at it.”
I’d been ripped to shreds and, in spite of it, been making jokes to a flat audience. This he found amusing?
“You aren’t kicking me out because you think you know what I’m going