my strong opinion that if Stephan A. Smith had attended an HBCU of the caliber of Blakewood, his renowned career would have been in athleticism and not just reporting on it.”
I could hear the sharp cackle from the other end of the line. A smile spread on Ashton’s face. He listened for a while as Jones spoke. I waited patiently, struggling to make a decision about what in the hell would be going down tonight—well, this morning. It was almost three at this point.
“I did, sir. Thanks,” Ashton nodded as he spoke. “I trust your Thanksgiving was filled with family and friends as mine was.” When his eyes landed on me, I quickly looked away. “Yes. I spoke with her earlier, and she told me how her sister, Sherell, was insistent on helping their cook with the green bean casserole this year.” He laughed. “I’m sure I’ll hear more details on the Coopers’ turkey day adventure all next week.” He paused, seemeing to let Jones finish his laughing fit. “Okay. You, too, sir. Give Ms. Tina my best.” He nodded. “No worries on the late hour. As you can see, I’m still up.” His eyes met me again, and I shifted my head to the television. “Goodnight.”
After hanging up, I could sense Ashton moving toward the other side of the room. I kept my attention ahead, butterflies dancing in my stomach.
Make the call now, Tori…
Now!
“I’m not fucking you tonight.”
I whipped my neck hard to find him. My eyes blinked hard and fast, chest expanded. “What?”
“I can read your body...laying there, full frame tense as you try to play cool. You’re avoiding looking my way. You want to fuck, and we won’t.”
My eyes shamefully spun to the television. The volume totally tuned out of my head. His every word crushed me. Gutted me speechless. The one guy—one person—I could trust cut me deep with just words. How stupid could I be to open myself to a human?
“Why did you bring me here? Why didn’t you wait to see me at the airport tomorrow?”
“Because I didn’t believe you had the money to make it back up to North Jersey.” His words poured effortlessly.
“And if I didn’t, why would you care?”
“You used your transportation allowance stupidly to support me. Why would I not make sure you got home for Thanksgiving to be with your family?”
“Stupidly?” Stunned, I nodded, accepting his meanness. The Ashton Spencer I knew well. “And I ‘stupidly’ didn’t exactly spend Thanksgiving with my family. I spent it with yours. Again, why did you bring me here, you fucking weirdo asshole of a cheating human?”
Quickly, his eyes flashed wide then rolled away, jaw flexing. He looked “stupidly” to the floor wordlessly. And almost as fast, I realized something happened. My heart dropped and I sucked in air through my nose. His face lacked its usual arrogance and murky grin. Ashton was stuck, busted, and vulnerable. I didn’t mean to shrink or embarrass him. Unlike him and his friends, I didn’t enjoy humiliating people. But how did I right his obvious pain? I was no good with words, not used to apologies. More than that, who ever got the opportunity to hurt the great Ashton Spencer? This was unreal!
“You want to know the truth? You wanna know how I hate that I can’t stop thinking about you? Tell you about how intense an experience it is for me to see you fight. And fighting!” He laughed bitterly. “I’m sure you’d love to hear how I snuck into a few of your practices and flew out to see your Minnesota fight, hiding in the back row where they didn’t turn the lights on.”
I lost my lungs and my nails bit into the flesh of my balled fists.
“How it’s so bad, I resent football and boxing, feeling they’re getting in the way of me exploring the first thing I’ve been fixated on since I released my pain on how my father would never spend time with me?” He heaved in a deep breath. “Okay. I’ll admit obsessing over the fact that I didn’t meet you before three months ago. I fantasize about going to a local amateur, female boxing match, so I could have encountered a poor, tomboyish, big-titty chic, who, underneath is a fucking wonder. Or I can tell you how I cheated on Aivery with you long before that day in my therapy session when I let you put your lips on my dick.”
His eyes finally hit mine, explaining what sounded like