of us. This is just the beginning, right? He made me come, and now it’s my turn to make him come. And then, I want him to be inside me. Just like last night. I want him to possess me again.
But I can’t go on like this. Not when I know what I know. Not when I feel the way I do about him and Annie and Dan and the realization that this is bigger than just this weekend.
“Ella?” he says my name deeply. He can probably see all the different emotions crossing over my face. His eyes are narrowed.
“There was a lady at the market today. She said she used to be your mother’s friend before your parents moved to Chicago.”
Reed clenches his jaw tightly. The mood is changing in the room already. Maybe I’m making a mistake. Maybe I should have held off on this conversation until tomorrow. For the car ride.
He turns his face away from me, refusing to look at me. He doesn’t want to talk about his mother.
“Why are you telling me this right now?” he asks.
“Because I can’t…I think you should know. If you want to…I don’t know what you would want to do about it.” I’m stammering.
He looks at me again. His blue eyes are dark.
“Say what you have to say, Ella.” His voice is so icy cold, I get a shiver.
“The woman got a letter from Annie soon after the accident. In her writing. She sounded distraught and depressed and said she had a big secret hanging over her. She said she didn’t know how to look after you.”
Reed stands up abruptly and picks up his shirt from the floor.
“I’m going for a walk,” he declares as he starts putting it on.
“What? Now? Reed, please, stay; maybe we should talk about this. Your mom is probably still out there somewhere.”
He stomps to the door and turns to look at me.
“What are you expecting me to do? Go looking for her?”
“I can do it, Reed. I can search for her. Isn’t this why you hired me? Because you wanted answers.”
“I’ve changed my mind,” he snaps. “Your job is done. I don’t want to know any more.”
“Reed!” I call after him just as he opens the door. Thankfully, he stops and looks at me again.
“If she is alive, it means the woman abandoned me. Gave up her own son. Didn’t give a shit how I was raised. I don’t need to find her. I know exactly what kind of person she is. She is dead to me.”
He slams the door behind him and I can hear him stomping down the stairs. I am still naked from the waist down and slowly start putting on the rest of my clothes.
My heart is still thudding in my chest as I sit down on the bed. I don’t know what I’m feeling. I don’t have a name for it.
I’m concerned for Reed. I have feelings for him. I want him to be happy. But it may all be over. He said my job is done. Am I supposed to just disappear from his life now?
It was late when Reed returned to the bedroom last night. I was still awake, but I’d turned the lights off and was lying on my side. From how soft he was trying to be around the room, I thought it was obvious he didn’t want to wake me up. He didn’t want to talk to me and I figured I should just leave him alone.
It’s morning now, and when I wake up, I know he’s slept the rest of the night beside me. I felt his presence there all night. But right now, he isn’t in the room. His bag isn’t here either.
I am suddenly panicked that he’s left without me. I stumble while putting my clothes on and stuffing things into my bag. What will I say to the Silvers? What explanation will I give for why Reed has disappeared? I don’t want to face them. I feel so embarrassed.
I run down the stairs hoping they’re not up and about yet, but I can already smell coffee in the kitchen and the stirring of pancake batter in a bowl. I can’t get to the main door without going past the kitchen, and they’ll see me then.
I take in a deep breath and try to gather myself. I just have to push through this. Say something convincing.
I step up to the kitchen door, and to my relief, I see Reed there at