room, waiting for me—her long dark curls falling over her slim shoulders, her creamy skin catching the light, her mesmerizing blue eyes, and her plump, perfect kiss-me lips I couldn’t wait to nip and sample and taste all over again.
As I popped the toothbrush into my mouth, I glanced at the mirror, looking at Marco behind me. “You can tell... your pretty someday-wife I’ll take that food... now. But something manlier than... gelatin.”
Marco chuckled. “You’re sure you’re steady?” When I nodded, he pushed away from the wall. “Don’t fall. I’ll be right back.”
I rolled my eyes and started brushing my teeth. Outside the bathroom door, I heard Marco talking to Fee and Natalie.
Natalie...
Not just my pretty wife. My gorgeous wife. Who’d come back to me. Who’d worn that stunning butterfly dress at our wedding. Who’d thawed every inch of that ice inside me simply by loving me. Who was safe now because I’d gotten my father and the Grande Cavaliere to agree to recognize our marriage.
I leaned forward to rinse my mouth only to grimace all over again when pain ripped down my spine.
Shit, I was not bending over.
Glancing around, I spotted a cup on the edge of the sink and used that to spit and rinse my mouth. When I was done, I looked up into the mirror again and frowned at my reflection. I really looked like hell. And I still had no idea wh—
My gaze caught sight of another reflection in the mirror. From across the room. The ladies’ vanity behind me was topped with a mirror, and in that mirror, I could see my back. Covered in something white.
I turned away from the mirror at the sink and glanced over my shoulder, trying to see better. “What the heck is tha—”
Everything came to a screeching halt. Everything except my adrenaline, which shot straight into the stratosphere.
I twisted to get a better look, my eyes growing wide. And when I saw the bandage covering me from my shoulder blades to my low back, memories flooded my mind. Every single memory I hadn’t been able to see let alone bring into focus since coming awake.
“Merda. Merda!” Bile shot up my throat. I gripped the sink and doubled over, fighting to keep from vomiting as the visions fired behind my eyes—being stripped, being chained down, being injected with all those drugs, the circle around me, the chanting, and those kittens—I still wasn’t sure how many—pawing at me with their hands, licking me with their tongues, and the blonde—
“Cazzo.”
I barely made it to the toilet in time. I retched, but there was nothing in my stomach, and all that came up was bile.
Footsteps pounded close. Voices filled the room. Hysterical voices—Marco’s, Fee’s...
“Luc!” Natalie screamed. “Oh my God...”
My stomach pitched again just from the sound of her voice, and I dropped to the floor in front of the toilet, bracing my hands on the bowl. “Get her out of here,” I growled. “Get her... out.”
I heaved again and bent over the bowl.
“Luc!” Panic filled Natalie’s voice.
Some kind of commotion was happening, but I couldn’t turn to look. All I could focus on was the blinding pain—not in my back this time, but in the center of my fucking soul.
“No, stop pushing me,” Natalie cried. “He needs me. Oh God. His bandages. Felicity, he’s bleeding through. He ripped his stitches. Luc!”
I didn’t give a goddamn about my stitches. That ritual, that beta riding me, pushing me toward a release I didn’t want, breaking my vow to Natalie... It all swirled in my head, making me retch until there was nothing left.
“Figlio di puttana, Luc.” Marco dropped to his knees next to me with a towel and pressed it into my hand as I sagged back. “Breathe, fratello.”
I was trying to, but, fuck, everything inside me hurt.
Long minutes passed where all I wanted to do was disappear back into that darkness and never re-emerge. Long minutes where I struggled to breathe, to think.
“Just... tell her... the meds made me sick,” I finally managed, knowing it was cowardly, but unable to come up with anything else. I swiped at my mouth with the towel and eased back against the wall only to jerk forward when my back hit the plaster and another burn shot across my skin.
“Merda.” Marco’s hands closed over my upper arms, helping me forward so I could sit up and not fucking fall. “She’s not gonna buy it.”
“She... will.” I closed my eyes and breathed deeply, shaking with the realization I