she was relieved to have a reason to skip out on volunteering. She felt like such a failure with Dakota. Everything she said was wrong. Like she was just making things worse. She sent a quick text to Wyatt.
So sorry, but I can’t make it today. I’m sick.
Wyatt texted back immediately.
Sick of Dakota?
CJ started to type something back about a horrible fever, but she deleted it. Maybe she could tell him she had cramps. He’d never question that. She deleted that too. Before she could come up with a third lie, her phone chimed with a new text from him.
The blue dots betray you, Clarke. I can see you trying to come up with a lie.
I’m not lying.
Okay. I’m lying.
But it’s not because of the reason you think.
As soon as she hit send on the last message, her phone rang. It was him. “Hello?” she said.
“Clarke. You don’t sound sick.”
“I already admitted I’m not.”
“Then talk to me. Why aren’t you gracing us with your presence today? If it’s because you think you failed as a volunteer, please don’t be so hard on yourself. You’re honestly not as bad as you think you are.”
“Well, thank you for that.”
“She’s a tough kid going through a tough time.”
“I know.”
“Then what’s going on?”
CJ sighed. “The thing is,” she said, “I’ve got another tough kid going through a tough time.”
“Are you lying to me again?”
“Not exactly.” Ava was seventeen. Technically that made her a kid, so technically it wasn’t a lie. “Look, here’s the deal. One of my best friends got partnered up for this portrait assignment with her mortal enemy.”
“Ah. High school drama. Tell me more.”
“Well, it’s kind of a long story. Freshman year he said this thing and—”
“You need to learn to recognize sarcasm. I absolutely do not care. Now get your butt down here.”
“I know it sounds dumb, but it actually is a big deal. She’s…” CJ stopped herself from saying fragile. Ava definitely wasn’t fragile. If anything, she was the strongest person CJ knew. “She’s special.”
“Again, Clarke. I don’t care. I’ll see you in fifteen minutes.”
CJ hung up and walked into the gym thirty seconds later. “I was in the parking lot,” she said when Wyatt raised a curious eyebrow.
“Clarke,” he said. “Don’t put so much pressure on yourself. You’re not here to change Dakota’s life. If we can eventually get her to play some tennis, awesome. But we can’t pull her out of this thing she’s in until she’s ready to come out. She’s gotta just be in it, you know?”
Dakota didn’t even say hello when she arrived. She went straight to the sideline, as was her habit. CJ waved. Dakota didn’t wave back. She thought about what Wyatt had said. That Dakota just needed to “be in it.” So she let Dakota be and helped run drills with the willing participants. After about twenty minutes, Dakota looked so sullen that CJ couldn’t take it anymore. She turned to Wyatt. “Do you mind if I…”
“Go,” he said.
CJ went over to the sideline and sat down next to her.
“Hey, Dakota.”
“Hey.”
“Where’s your mom today? I didn’t see her drop you off.”
“Angus’s dad drove me.” Angus was a boy with death-metal stickers all over the back of his chair. “My mom is having coffee with another mom. The mom of my—this girl I used to be friends with.”
“You’re not friends anymore?”
Dakota shook her head. “She’s mean. I hate her. We got in a fight, and now our moms have to have coffee and talk about us.”
“What was the fight about?”
Dakota looked away. CJ could tell she’d hit a nerve. “I sometimes fight with my friends,” CJ said. “It feels awful, but deep down, even when we’re fighting, I know we still love each other.”
“It’s not the same. She’ll never be my friend again. I don’t have any friends.”
“I bet that’s not true. I know that’s not true. Because I’m your friend.”
Dakota gave CJ a pained look. “That’s even worse than having no friends. You’re just some creepy adult who gets paid to hang out with me.”
“I’m not getting paid,” CJ said. “I’m not even an adult. Dakota, I’m just trying to figure out everything too. The truth is, I’m kind of a mess. More than people realize sometimes. I get overwhelmed. I get scared. So I might understand better than you think. You can talk to me about anything. That’s what friends do for each other.”
Tears immediately sprang to Dakota’s eyes. Then there was a flash of anger. “YOU ARE NOT MY FRIEND!”
Heads