took her like her life meant nothing.
I also felt an overwhelming amount of peace and closure. Violet did know that what she was doing was wrong. She wanted to change, to do better. She wanted to be a mom and give her baby the unconditional love she never got from her own mother. And now I knew without a doubt that Violet did love me.
I asked Chase if he could print the email. While he was doing that, I dug around for a pen and some paper. I sat back down and let my words to Violet pour out.
Dear Violet,
Sometimes I wonder if I ever really knew you. It took me a while to navigate my feelings about all of this, and in the end, there is still love. It’s not as blinding as before. It’s layered with hurt and regret. But it’s there, still making a home for itself in my heart. You’ll always be my Violet. Always be my best friend.
I wish I understood why you did this. I wish I understood why you risked it all. I’d like to think I would have helped you. But we’ll never know.
But this letter isn’t about all the things you’ve done wrong. I think you’ve already paid the price for that in blood. In loss. I’m sorry you were alone, Violet. I’m sorry for your baby.
I wanted to thank you. Our story might not be conventional, but I love Kai. I deeply, irrevocably love him. You taught me how to live every day to its fullest. I opened my heart because of you. I’ll always be thankful for the lessons you taught me. I’ll always be thankful for him. I’ll watch Chase. I promise to take care of him.
Love Always,
Breeze
When Chase returned with the printed copy of the email, I took it and my letter and held them both in my hands. I grabbed Chase’s hand and led him outside, down the back staircase, and to the beach where their fire pit was.
I turned the knob, and after a moment, flames sprung to life out of the beautiful crystals that filled the pit. I tossed both letters into the fire at the same time, one letter from the living and one from a ghost. Chase and I stood there and watched as the paper turned to ash and floated out onto the ocean.
Time was a funny thing. Even though so much of it had passed, it still felt like Violet had just gone missing. That was back when I thought that finding her body had been the conclusion to a nightmare and not the beginning. Even though it had only been a few weeks since my father’s arrest and the DNA test revealed that he was the father of Violet’s unborn child, I had to remind myself every morning that Violet was gone and my father was in prison for taking her from us.
Today was The Big Wave surf competition, the semi-annual counterpart to the Charging into Christmas competition where Kai really noticed me for the first time. This time six months ago, I was excited for all of the buzz around the island, the commotion associated with the competition, and the potential business for the surf shop. Violet was picking out her sexiest swimsuit and expertly applying eyeliner and lashes to look her best for Kai.
Today I felt none of that same elation. I was going to support Chase and Kai, but I still didn’t really even know where I stood with Kai. Our occasional texting dwindled down to nothing. I wanted to respect his space. I wanted to understand, but I was also dealing with my own shit. I’d never been the girl to chase something that wasn’t mine. I liked to wait for the perfect wave to come crashing into me. I was okay when I didn’t think about it, but I knew that all of the feelings I had been suppressing were going to surface once I saw him again. I subconsciously brought my hand to my neck where I let my fingers run over the tiny silver surfboard.
I pulled on my favorite suit and paired it with some cutoff shorts. I threw on a T-shirt and grabbed my beach bag, tossing in a water bottle and a full bottle of sunblock. Since I knew I was going to be seeing Kai, I swiped on some waterproof mascara and blush. I also tamed my hair, holding it back with a ponytail. I made a mental note